To the Boy Who Broke Me Without Knowing It
I was always a fiercely independent person. My parents raised me well; they taught me how to aim high—how to keep my grades, my job, and my future intact. They made sure I was self-sufficient, and thanks to them, I never depended on anyone.
I was practical enough to avoid "bad boys," though my parents neglected to tell me about boys like you. I don't blame them for failing to teach me about picking up the broken pieces you left behind, or for not warning me that sometimes, the nicest guys are the most dangerous—that's the kind of thing you learn yourself. And if it weren't for you, I never would have known the truth, that I could be broken. So thank you for that lesson.
You weren't a bad boy, but ironically, that was the problem. You were such a great guy—kind and intelligent and so...different from all the other guys who were spoiled and self-entitled. Thank you for teaching me to be less cynical on the aspect of love. Thank you for showing me that not all guys were selfishly shallow. But most importantly, thank you for restoring my faith in romance; I was practical and serious for so long, but you taught me how to fall in love again.
Perhaps you knew how I felt. Perhaps you didn't. Even to this day, I'm still not sure if you ever cared about me. We would talk about every single thing under the sun, no matter how small, how solemn, or how shocking. We discussed everything together, whether it was something as austere as political matters or something as hilarious as punny memes. We shared our dreams together, and bonded over our big plans for the future. Finally, I had met someone who was as passionately driven as I was, and you felt the same way, too.
Basically, we became each other's person, the one who we could always talk to—the one person we thought would never leave. For indeed, just for a moment, what we had felt like it would last forever.
When you left, make no mistake: I was not devastated. After all, even before meeting you, I was a serious soul. I was not foolish. You had begun pulling away little by little. Until now, I don't know why. Maybe you were too busy with personal matters, like grades and health. That was understandable—except I shared those issues, too, and I still succeeded. Maybe you were tired of me. That would have been cruel, yet highly unlikely—because I see how you still care even now with your guilty eyes and blushing cheeks. Finally, after much much observation with your change—it's sad how you went from being my best friend to a mere stranger—I realized: You were scared.
People usually think "nice guys" are the best guys—the perfect ones, the boys who have their entire life together. But your kindness was your undoing. It made you afraid of taking risks. You were too practical, too fearful of allowing your heart to speak instead of your mind for once. Your biggest asset became your downfall. Ever the gentleman, you left slowly, easing your way out of my life. You thought it was for our own good, that you were doing me a favor, that falling in love would only end up hurting us both. Well, you were right. I know you didn't intend to be mean, but did I really mean anything to you?
I know you didn't intend to be mean, but did I really mean anything to you?
In the end, you broke me, but only for a little while. You showed me more about life and love than I ever imagined. My old self shattered but I learned how to pick up the pieces again. You were a lesson learned—that love with someone was possible, after all, as long as I learned to love myself first. One day, my new self emerged, stronger and wiser than ever. I never would have improved without you. So to the boy who broke me temporarily but who allowed me to fix myself permanently: From the bottom of my heart, thank you.
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To the Person Who Does Not Know Any 1D Song
By: CJ Reyno
Never in my wildest dream I imagined to meet someone who does not know a single One Direction song or who does not even know, Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, Liam Payne, Niall Horan, and err… Zayn Malik. How did you spend your teenagehood without listening to their songs? The disrespect to my #StyPayHorLikSon. My initial reaction, Vas Happenin’?
Since I was 12 years old, that was way back on 2012, One Direction songs have been my official life soundtrip, my go-to songs whenever I feel happy, sad, mad, excited, and etch. I can still remember how people went crazy just to attend their concert here in the Philippines. I must admit, I was one of those. LOL. The group was also dubbed as, “The Biggest Boyband in the World”. They were an era. You really left me in awe when you told me that you do not know a single One Direction song. Their songs are gold. But I was a little hopeful when a new messaged popped up on our conversation, “Hey I know one, Make You Beautiful”.
You do not know how my world collapsed after reading your message. I would like to say that I appreciate the effort, thanks, but they do not have a song entitled, Make You Beautiful, because it is, What Makes You Beautiful. I tried to explain but you said that they are just the same. (Tip: Never fight with a Directioner when it comes to this because we will not let our guards down). No! They are not the same. How can you make this big mistake? LOL. What Makes You Beautiful is One Direction’s debut song. Almost everyone knows this, “you’re insecure, don’t know what for,” ring a bell? The music video of this surpassed 1 billion views on Youtube. On my 21 years of existence, you are the very first person who told me this “I-Thought-It-Was-A-Joke-But-You-Are-Serious” statement.
As a persuasive fangirl, I thought to myself that I should make you appreciate their music, that you should know that it is What Makes You Beautiful, not Make You Beautiful. The group may be in hiatus but their music is and will always remain superior. You are hard-headed lad. We even when to the point where you challenged me to treat so I can make you watch their music video. Am I even surprised that I agreed to this? HAHA. I feel like an agent trying to persuade her customer to buy a property on our company. You do not know how happy I was when you sent me your video listening to What Makes You Beautiful. I felt like I successfully closed a deal with my client. Not to exaggerate but I really jumped because of happiness after watching your video. It was the first message I checked that morning. Thank you for your effort, so much appreciated. Funny how our conversation starts with your innocence on One Direction until it goes deeper and last longer. Up All Nigh conversations which turned to almost Midnight Memories. Ironic how a Directioner had developed an admiration on someone who dislikes her favorite boys? Just like One Direction’s song, Change My Mind, “Never felt like this before. Are we friends or are we more?” I guess, like Liam’s line on Love You Goodbye, “It's inevitable everything that's good comes to an end. It's impossible to know if after this we can still be friends.”
I was happy that I made you listen to One Direction. At least I made you appreciate and made you aware that there is a song called, What Makes You Beautiful, not Make You Beautiful. I am happy that you already found your Girl Almighty. Wish me luck on finding my Summer Love. xoxo, Your Directioner friend
Here's a fan art that I made for Lee Joo Young of Itaewon class! I've been making digital illustration since last year and I'm happy that I was able to see my improvements. I'm also happy to see people's reactions and support for my craft even though all of it are made through my phone (adobe illustrator) only ????. You don't actually have to use expensive or complicated medium as long as you know how to be creative and like what you're doing, then you can do it. ????