There will come a time when you'll grow up, see the world in a new perspective, and want something permanent. The moment you start getting serious about relationship is the moment you should check if you're dating a man—not a boy. Maturity doesn't come with age, and so does being a man. Just because you're dating a 25-year-old guy (or older), it doesn't mean he's a man. If a guy doesn't cry, does that make him a man? There are characteristics that make someone a man, and looking like one isn't part of it. If you want to know if you're dating a man, here are the things you need to take note of.
- A man says what he means and means what he says; a boy says what he thinks you want to hear.
If you're a woman with integrity, your man should be like that, too. The saying, "actions speak louder than words" can't be genuine in a relationship if your actions can't back up your words. A relationship shouldn't be a guessing game. Saying I love you is easy, but proving that you really do is hard, and that's what makes it more real.
- A man is secure with his identity; a boy tries to fit in with society's perspective.
A man knows he's a man, and doesn't feel the need to prove it to anyone. We live in a world where people believe you're a man if you look like one, and we should start changing that. You can wear the manliest shirt ever, own a car...AND STILL BE A BOY. Being a man is formed on the inside, not on the outside.
- A man is proud of your success; a boy is threatened by it.
Boys are threatened with successful and independent women, while men are proud. A man is not scared of you outshining his achievements because he knows you deserve everything you have right now. And he’s there every step of the way to support you. He’s inspired to be the best version of himself. And because of this, you’ll grow together.
- A man is humble; a boy is overconfident.
Dating a guy who's overconfident can be really tiring, right? There are times when you have to pretend you're listening to everything he's saying about himself. Boys love to brag; they're all about Me, Myself and I. A man is humble, he knows when (and how) to talk about himself without sounding like he's boastful.
- A man is ready to face rejection; a boy avoids it.
It's normal to be afraid of being rejected. That's why sometimes, we act passive just to save our pride from getting stomped on. But a man won't let his fear rule him because he knows you're worth it.
- A man lives for the future; a boy only lives in the present.
Live in the present time, but be mindful that whatever you do in the present can affect your future. If a man wants a stable life with you, he knows that he can only achieve it if he leaves his comfort zone and works hard.
- A man cares for intelligence and personality; a boy only cares for looks.
A man appreciates your beauty, but will love you for your intelligence and personality. He knows that you're more than just a pretty face. A man will look for a woman who has the same shared values as he has, while a boy will only be physically attracted to someone.
- A man is committed; a boy is afraid of it.
If you're dating a guy who can't commit, leave. NOW. This is a red flag! You deserve someone who is devoted to his goals...and still treats you as his priority. If a guy only wants to do things just for fun, that's not the right guy for you. Being a man means sacrificing things, and destroying what destroys you. And that's the same thing as being a woman. Don't be afraid to choose a man over a boy. A boy can make you happy now, but a man can give you a happy life. And that's what matters most.