From Best Friend to Boyfriend

When BF starts to take on a different meaning, what do you do?
by Alan Abeleda   |  Jan 21, 2010
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The love math can be so much fun when you're a star on primetime TV. It's all about addition, multiplication, and even a little division. Check these out: Vanessa + Dan, Nate + Blair, Serena + Nate, Blair + Chuck.

In real life, as in the reel world, falling in love with your best friend is a set-up every true romantic would call a win/win situation. For starters, that awkward getting-to-know-you phrase is one less major roadblock to contend with. But getting to the point where you call each other "babe" (and I don't mean the lovable pig) and take turn sipping from same glass of iced tea doesn't always happen in a flash. It took the Upper East Siders three seasons before Dan realized (with Olivia's help) he was really in love with V. And Chuck finally getting together with Blair was no walk in the park, so why should it be any easier for you?

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But first things first... Before attempting to turn a male friend into a boyfriend, you must first acknowledge that romance can grow between you and him. Can you see yourself holding his hand (and not just to arm wrestle) or kissing him without cringing at the thought?

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But admitting that love can happen between really good friends is tough. Proceed with caution or that giant leap of faith might turn into a painful belly flop. When you say "I could fall for (fill in his name)," you've got to mean it. Not because you mom thinks he's great or your girlfriends think he's cute, but because you think he's cool.

Don't misread his buddy language. Being best friends doesn't always come with a free pass to "Sweethearts Ville." Believe me, this is a thought you need to understand before you even dream about becoming his girlfriend.

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"But he understands me like no other guy, accepts me for me, and he's always there," you say. But does that give you license to profess your undying love for him? Nope. It's pathetic and the odds of you getting burned are high. Sure, the situation can swing either way: Your bud may get a flash of inspiration and realize he's in love with you too. Either that of you hear him start to say "I really like you, but..." Ouch.

Maybe what he feels for you is a case of brotherly love. Or maybe you're just feeling lonely and bored, and he just happens to be there. If this is the case, you know you both deserve much better than just settling for each other.


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Alan Abeleda
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