14 Love Lessons We Learned from Our Moms
Throughout the years, our moms have been occasionally dropping truth bombs in car rides home, after-school dinner dates, and in the quick moments in dressing rooms. We tend to forget that our mothers went through everything we're going through right now: Crushes, feelings and other mind-numbing things. It is with great pleasure that I share with you 14 li'l nuggets of wisdom that mine has shared with me:
1 The ideal guy isn't actually the right one.
Whether we'd like to admit it or not, we all have this mental image tucked away in the depths of our brain of what constitutes as the perfect guy: Most likely the lovechild of the three most perfect Chris-es in this world—with the looks of Evans, the charm and humor of Pratt, and of course, the godlike features of Hemsworth, onscreen or offscreen. And even if this person (or demigod) might exist in the far far future, if he doesn't make you feel butterflies in your stomach and makes your face light up when you see him, it's not love.
2 Love calls for logic.
Life is not one, big romantic comedy. Believe me when I say I wish it was. Your heart can be wrong, trust me, and so can your brain. Never let your heart take over your whole body and end up doing something rash. You cannot always act based on a feeling. It's a two-way street. Listen to what your heart is saying but also to what your brain is telling you too.
3 It's okay to do stupid things in love.
I feel like doing stupid things is like a rite of passage when you fall in love. If you've never done anything stupid for someone else, you've never been in love.
4 Never underestimate the power of friendship as a foundation for a relationship.
Common interests are and will always be important. If you can't talk to him about a) chicken wings, b) puppies, or c) some misconstrued theory about the universe at 2AM, then I highly suggest you rethink things.
5 You'll never know what you like until you try it.
You can't claim to hate something you've never actually experienced. It's not good to always look for this one thing in a person. I mean, who knows? You might find yourself in a relationship with the complete opposite of what you were originally looking for.
6 Trust your gut.
I cannot stress this enough—first impressions may not always be true but they do say a lot.
7 There is no written rule about what kind of person you will fall in love with.
When we reach the age wherein we start having crushes, we're never really given a guidebook of what our "type" looks like. You don't always fall in love with the musician or the athlete. As we change, our "type" changes too.
8 Don't hold on to the hurt.
When you hold on to your anger, you're still giving that person power over you. It may take weeks, months or years even to let go, but you'll get there.
9 Your soulmate will not always be your partner.
Fall in love with your career, with your friends, or your dog. To your surprise, you might see that they can be your soulmates too.
10 Trust comes with love.
These two do not come separately. You can't be in a relationship with a person you don't trust. It just won't work out.
11 Don't put anyone on a high pedestal.
When you develop feelings for someone, you tend to construct this grand idea of that person that's not necessarily true to life. It's not healthy to do that. And once you see yourself that he's not that great, or kind, or whatever else you thought he was, you're left with nothing but disappointment.
12 The way he treats other people is a reflection of what kind of person he really is.
Listen to your mother when she says that it's important how he treats the waiter or the elderly. It really is. You wouldn't want to be with a person who's only ever nice to you. That, my friends, is deception.
READ: Missing My Mommy
13 Never shrink yourself for someone else.
There's this preconceived notion that women often dumb themselves down in order for men not to feel so bad. Who benefits from this, really? If you have something to say, say it. If you feel like you're on opposite sides of a political argument, then defend your point. If you're an expert on astrophysics, then bore him with a lecture on celestial bodies over dinner. You are who you are, and you shouldn't have to change that, especially for the right person.
14 Nothing lasts forever.
Out of all the nuggets of wisdom my mom has imparted to me, this just might be my favorite one. Nothing in this world lasts forever—not even your heartbreak, your hurt or your unparalleled love for whichever cute barista is at your nearest Starbucks. Sooner or later, we all move on to greener pastures and I think that’s beautiful. Plus, just look at One Direction. Oops, too soon? Probably too soon. Okay, maybe that heartbreak will last forever.
READ: I Was A Teenage Mommy
What lessons have you learned from your moms, Candy Girls? Share them with us in the comments or via Twitter @candymagdotcom.
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Hi, my sister sent me this link :)
I would like my vlog to be featured in Candy! I believe that if my vlog gets featured in Candy, I will be able to help more aspiring med students! I made this a Youtube vlog just like three weeks ago. So far, I have been receiving messages that they find my med school videos informative! My vlog focuses on med school tips :) So far, these are my content:
Check out the Med School Interview tips I have for UPCM, St. Luke’s, UERM, and ASMPH here: https://youtu.be/lnxqhIktcIM
Check out what’s in my Med Kit for ward works here: https://youtu.be/FbiyerNMkJ4
If you haven’t watched Hospital Playlist, let us tell you why you should watch it here: https://youtu.be/mDOcM-Jd1e8
Do you have any Med School Worries? Watch this! Candy Cutie Eljohn Yee might have answered it:
Wanna know more about UPCM Intarmed? Click here: https://youtu.be/XnKtPxQYIkg
Thank you! Hope we can both work together to inspire med students :)
To the Person Who Does Not Know Any 1D Song
By: CJ Reyno
Never in my wildest dream I imagined to meet someone who does not know a single One Direction song or who does not even know, Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, Liam Payne, Niall Horan, and err… Zayn Malik. How did you spend your teenagehood without listening to their songs? The disrespect to my #StyPayHorLikSon. My initial reaction, Vas Happenin’?
Since I was 12 years old, that was way back on 2012, One Direction songs have been my official life soundtrip, my go-to songs whenever I feel happy, sad, mad, excited, and etch. I can still remember how people went crazy just to attend their concert here in the Philippines. I must admit, I was one of those. LOL. The group was also dubbed as, “The Biggest Boyband in the World”. They were an era. You really left me in awe when you told me that you do not know a single One Direction song. Their songs are gold. But I was a little hopeful when a new messaged popped up on our conversation, “Hey I know one, Make You Beautiful”.
You do not know how my world collapsed after reading your message. I would like to say that I appreciate the effort, thanks, but they do not have a song entitled, Make You Beautiful, because it is, What Makes You Beautiful. I tried to explain but you said that they are just the same. (Tip: Never fight with a Directioner when it comes to this because we will not let our guards down). No! They are not the same. How can you make this big mistake? LOL. What Makes You Beautiful is One Direction’s debut song. Almost everyone knows this, “you’re insecure, don’t know what for,” ring a bell? The music video of this surpassed 1 billion views on Youtube. On my 21 years of existence, you are the very first person who told me this “I-Thought-It-Was-A-Joke-But-You-Are-Serious” statement.
As a persuasive fangirl, I thought to myself that I should make you appreciate their music, that you should know that it is What Makes You Beautiful, not Make You Beautiful. The group may be in hiatus but their music is and will always remain superior. You are hard-headed lad. We even when to the point where you challenged me to treat so I can make you watch their music video. Am I even surprised that I agreed to this? HAHA. I feel like an agent trying to persuade her customer to buy a property on our company. You do not know how happy I was when you sent me your video listening to What Makes You Beautiful. I felt like I successfully closed a deal with my client. Not to exaggerate but I really jumped because of happiness after watching your video. It was the first message I checked that morning. Thank you for your effort, so much appreciated. Funny how our conversation starts with your innocence on One Direction until it goes deeper and last longer. Up All Nigh conversations which turned to almost Midnight Memories. Ironic how a Directioner had developed an admiration on someone who dislikes her favorite boys? Just like One Direction’s song, Change My Mind, “Never felt like this before. Are we friends or are we more?” I guess, like Liam’s line on Love You Goodbye, “It's inevitable everything that's good comes to an end. It's impossible to know if after this we can still be friends.”
I was happy that I made you listen to One Direction. At least I made you appreciate and made you aware that there is a song called, What Makes You Beautiful, not Make You Beautiful. I am happy that you already found your Girl Almighty. Wish me luck on finding my Summer Love. xoxo, Your Directioner friend
Here's a fan art that I made for Lee Joo Young of Itaewon class! I've been making digital illustration since last year and I'm happy that I was able to see my improvements. I'm also happy to see people's reactions and support for my craft even though all of it are made through my phone (adobe illustrator) only ????. You don't actually have to use expensive or complicated medium as long as you know how to be creative and like what you're doing, then you can do it. ????