Do you ever just sit in one corner and think of how far you've become from the first time your heart was broken? Back to the nights when you would cry your self to sleep, to the slightly better days of moving on, to all of a sudden waking up one day with hopes of giving it another shot?
And so you willingly risked your heart out once more. Giving into optimistic possibilities of maybe, just maybe, making it right this time around, when both of you have already learned from your own mistakes and realizations have turned into opportunities of building a stronger relationship now. Then finally, you're into the joyful bliss of getting back together, taking it step by step, sharing stories you missed when you were both busy finding yourselves, admitting how much you've appreciated your partner while you were both gone in each other's arms. By this time you will feel the sense of security and assurance, thinking that no amount of obstacles and challenges can tear you apart since you are both committed to make the most out of your second chance. Until you are back to your daily grind and good old fashioned ways, supporting your partner in his choices towards achieving his dreams with you, and vice versa.
Suddenly you are choosing to ignore the slight changes of your happy relationship, knowing that it's just part of growing up. But then you begin to question if you are really growing with your partner, or facing the sad truth again that maybe somewhere along the road, you’ve already out-grown each other. The calls have become shorter and you realize that blank moments have increased. Minutes or hours can pass by when you just ran out of words to say and stories to tell. You miss the times when you could talk about anything and everything until 3am, but absolutely does not get bored from the randomness and spontaneous sweet gestures you once were never tired of. You deny that perhaps the excitement is already lost. You have your own disappointments from your little expectations, but chooses to hide them anyway in the fear of creating bigger problems out of it. Sadly, you just choose to endure the pain than lose him again. You refuse to confront the problems you've noticed because you are afraid he might interpret it as a reason for breaking up, the second time around. Oh, you know you can't go through it all again. You can't lose the person you've fought long enough for. You just can't lose the only battle you’ve put your whole soul in winning.
The calls have become shorter and you realize that blank moments have increased. Minutes or hours can pass by when you just ran out of words to say and stories to tell.
After awhile, the reality has hit you hard, second chances are not always a guarantee to a happily ever after. Your reasons for staying have been outweighed by the reasons for trying even harder. Regardless of whoever initiated the second breakup, whether there's closure or not, be proud of yourself. You have been so tough to conquer all the heartaches, pretentions and doubts all this time. Never regret anything, not even letting your heart broken again although you already saw it coming. It is better to have that failed second chance than to always have those "what ifs," "should've done that," "should've than this" running on your mind. Always be thankful for taking the risk, no matter what. At least this experience has taught you so much about yourself as it will only really equip you for your future one. Trust in the concept of love that always perseveres, most importantly, own a heart that never ceases to be whole again.
Sent in by Francesca Isabel Montenegro. Got your own story to tell? Submit your feels! We'd love to hear what you have to say. If you're lucky, you just might get published in this space, too! Please indicate if you want to remain anonymous. We're also looking for artwork and illustrations to use with the stories, so please send some in if you want to be featured! Please send original, unpublished work only.