Communication Arts Student with Bone Cancer Fulfills Wish to 'Die Beautiful'
Racine Pregunta, a Communication Arts student in Davao City, had her whole life ahead of her. The youngest of three sisters, the bubbly and charming Racine had also been tapped for to model in several photo shoots.
In 2016, Racine was diagnosed with bone cancer, specifically high-grade osteosarcoma. Her family took her to the hospital on October 18, 2016. On November 1, 2016, her right foot was amputated.
Racine's sister, Rolyn revealed, "Racine remained her usual bubbly self after her amputation. When we would go to the mall, she was so confident about walking around. It was as if the amputation never happened." In fact, Racine had even joked to Rolyn, "Ate, tell the truth. I'm still beautiful even if I no longer have one foot, right?"
Rolyn related that their family was actually optimistic that Racine would make a full recovery. After all, the the amputation had been a success. Meanwhile, Racine was trying to gain weight so she would be strong enough to undergo chemotherapy. Racine celebrated her 20th birthday on December 12, 2016. Later that same month, Rolyn remembers that they watched the movie, Die Beautiful. The movie would later play a part in Racine's dying wish.
Rolyn said that because the whole family was hopeful that Racine was on the mend, they even made plans to go on a trip to Japan.
Rolyn said that the last time she and Racine went out was on March 22. They had gone to SM Lanang to watch Beauty And The Beast. Shortly after that, Racine's health took a turn for the worse.
Rolyn wrote that on April 12, Racine asked for an off-shoulder white dress and a white flowerband. Later on, she also asked for something that had her three favorite colors: violet, blue, and mint green. When Rolyn asked her what it was for, Racine replied, "You know what it's for."
At this point, Racine's friends, as well as the family relatives, made it a point to visit Racine every day at the hospital. Through it all, Racine's cheerfulness never wavered.
On April 13, Racine told Rolyn, "I want to be beside Papa." Their father had died in 2010.
Rolyn related, "I consulted our mom about it and she told me, 'If we can afford to buy the lot beside my father's grave.' Then, she practically suggested, 'What if we just place it on top of your dad's grave?' I immediately relayed the message to Racine and she answered, 'It's fine.'"
Racine then added her request, "If I die, I want to die beautiful."
Racine died on April 17. Rolyn immediately tapped Gladys Fernandez Ayuste, Racine's favorite makeup artist, to help fulfill Racine's final wish.
Racine's remains were laid to rest at the Davao Memorial Park on April 21.
Rolyn said she, like everyone else in their family, already misses her little sister. Despite the sadness, though, she has many happy memories to sustain her. In fact, Rolyn recalls that on the day Racine died, she had greeted her, "Good morning. Thank you that you are still here." Then, she kissed Racine on the cheek and told her, "I love you."
"Whenever I told her, 'I love you,' Racine's response would always be automatic," Rolyn said.
After that, Rolyn and a cousin of theirs prayed over Racine. Shortly after that, Racine was gone. Rolyn stated, "It hurts but I'm happy that she passed away peacefully."
Photos of Racine Pregunta were used with permission or provided by Rolyn Pregunta.
This story originally appeared on Cosmo.ph.
* Minor edits have been made by the Candymag.com editors.
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these sheets that exactly remind me of how I gushed in between my pillow and space you filled in the longing of my burned sorrow put smile to my sober face just like how a three year old receive her lollipop
i searched you everywhere and here you are laying down beside me in my imagination the walls that our screens built a boundary and an obvious message that says i can never have you because you wear clerical shirt and obviously you loved someone else before me
oh god, do I really want this forbidden love? that only exist in my imagination? that only exist through my words? would you, meine liebling, notice me and my art one second? because I am dying to say I love you.
A Simple Learner Who's a Great Pretender
Maybe I'm just a learner, not a weirdo. A learner that knows how to listen and pretend. A simple learner who's a great pretender. Pretending to be slightly dumb enough not to be judged and criticized by those who do not appreciate my existence. We surround ourselves with people who's levels are either beyond or below our intellectual behavior, because as for reality, people may use you either for their success or your downfall. Since then, people tend to judge someone who has an intellect with things they shouldn't be. Making them a criticizer, and most of all, calling them weird.
Honestly, I'm one of this "weirdo" who actually loves to learn things, and for the record, I'm bullied and stressed out for making myself not to learn more and go with the flow to dumbness I had. Have you ever feel being assigned to some task where you know every process to make it easier and faster to finish but turns out to hesitate to voice out because some of your mates put themselves in charge. There are times where I know what to do, what to say, or how to react, but kept myself silent and pretend not to know anything that may help us. Maybe it's a good thing to just go with their ideas and learn from their perspectives, but sometimes you can't control it and says something, and once again called to be a weirdo and let you finish the work by yourself.
It's annoying that you only know one process yet they gave you the whole work and let you finish it by yourself because they insist that "MAGALING KA DIBA?". It's not your fault being an intellectual person, knowing such things that may help you to pursue your dreams, and have the basic knowledge about something. You don't need to know everything, just the basics. And as for those people who do not appreciate your existence, let them be and continue what's the best for you. In some cases, you'll be annoyed by this but most of the time you'll be thankful for it. Not for now but maybe later. Just be yourself either a weirdo, a great pretender, or a simple learner, and always remember to lower your voice and behavior because no one loves that.
Just be a great pretender not to hear any runts and be a good learner that appreciates everything. It's out of nowhere thoughts of mine, but simply I leave you this my favorite life quotation; "Don't introduce yourself, Let your success introduce you"
Dear me in six years, I wonder how life will treat you when you’re already 26 years old. Will you be financially stable? Will you be working in an advertising agency while pursuing everything about the arts? Will you be doing freelancing and living in a condo by then? I don’t know since things are very uncertain. I hope by the time you graduate from college and face the real meaning of the world, you’ll know what the real purpose of doing and living in the art will be.
I know it’s been so tough ever since you turned 20 but that’s how life works, I guess. There will be a lot of hopes and trials, breakdowns, and breakthroughs but I have high hopes of you becoming the better version of yourself. You always do, though. You were never a quitter. Making decisions is getting harder and harder as you grow but I hope it doesn’t make you stop doing what you really love to do. You will face different people with different perspectives. You will feel like a stranger once again, it’s like you were back in your freshmen year. It’s going to be tougher than you’ve expected but you can do it. I believe you can.
Most of the time, people's perception of us as a strong person makes us feel that we are not entitled to be vulnerable because they might be disappointed for seeing our weak spots. And so when we are hurting, we are often scared of extreme emotions and so bury our feelings. We deny them, trying to avoid the pain we feel.
But by doing that, we are just allowing it to come back to us and haunt us. And when it comes back, it might be stronger and it will be harder for us to get over it than when we faced them first. I realized it just now that facing those emotions will scare them until they're gone. The saying 'Let it hurt until it hurts no more' goes true. Admitting your pain to yourself doesn't make you weak. It only proves that you are strong enough to acknowledge such extreme emotions without avoiding them. We are humans and it's okay if we hurt sometimes.