Single Since Birth—I Want To Try Dating But I Don’t Know Where To Start
Being single is a bliss. You get to focus on your own growth more and fulfill your #selflove2020 goals. But just because you enjoy and cherish the single life doesn’t mean you are automatically closing yourself off from all possibilities of ever dating in the near future. It’s okay to love your lonesomeness and still be interested in the idea of being in a relationship. If you’re a newbie to the whole dating concept, however, it might be daunting at first to actually try it out for yourself. In that case, here are a few things that might help.
Try dating apps.
Yes, mom, online dating is a thing now. And while you may have to exercise some caution as you swipe left and right, many relationships born out of dating apps actually thrive in the long run. Maybe it’s because there’s a higher chance for you to meet people you actually connect and share similar interests and quirks with through apps like these, but hey, you’d have to experience it for yourself to actually find out.
There are many apps on the market at the moment, and each have their own niche, so you’d really have to try them out to see which ones are more your taste. A word of warning though: You’d have to be extra careful with who you swipe right on, because not everyone has the same wholesome dating agenda as you. We also wouldn’t rule out a couple of mini heartbreaks when your potential online bae ghosts you out of the blue. But hey, every failed experience is a lesson learned, so you’ll know better next time.
Try doing something you’re actually interested in.
If meeting someone from a dating app just isn’t your thing, we get it. Maybe you’re someone who enjoys meeting people offline and bonding over mutual interests, and that’s totally fine. If that’s the case, why not get into something you’d actually enjoy doing? Join an org or volunteer for an event, go to a gig or try out a sport. These are just a few of the many ways you can meet people organically. Strike up a conversation with different people and get to know them better. The next thing you know, you might already be heading out for some afterschool coffee date or are already looking forward to the next gig you’re both attending.
Go out more and interact with people offline.
Many of us are homebodies and would rather binge-watch K-dramas, vlogs, and Instagram stories of people we barely even know (or is that just us?). But let’s be real, despite the convenience of being online almost 24/7 to slide into people’s DMs, nothing really compares to interacting with people IRL (sorry, Instagram and Messenger stans). If you’ve got the time to put yourself out there in the real world, literally, then this dating option might serve you well.
The more you experience life without a screen in front of your face, the more you realize how equally essential offline social connections are. Real-life interaction with all sorts of people helps you practice your social skills in different settings, which might come in handy when it’s finally time for you to strike up a conversation with someone you like. Because as much as people appreciate “good morning” and “kumain ka na ba?” messages, there’s a lot more to know about your crush than whether or not they already ate their breakfast.
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these sheets that exactly remind me of how I gushed in between my pillow and space you filled in the longing of my burned sorrow put smile to my sober face just like how a three year old receive her lollipop
i searched you everywhere and here you are laying down beside me in my imagination the walls that our screens built a boundary and an obvious message that says i can never have you because you wear clerical shirt and obviously you loved someone else before me
oh god, do I really want this forbidden love? that only exist in my imagination? that only exist through my words? would you, meine liebling, notice me and my art one second? because I am dying to say I love you.
A Simple Learner Who's a Great Pretender
Maybe I'm just a learner, not a weirdo. A learner that knows how to listen and pretend. A simple learner who's a great pretender. Pretending to be slightly dumb enough not to be judged and criticized by those who do not appreciate my existence. We surround ourselves with people who's levels are either beyond or below our intellectual behavior, because as for reality, people may use you either for their success or your downfall. Since then, people tend to judge someone who has an intellect with things they shouldn't be. Making them a criticizer, and most of all, calling them weird.
Honestly, I'm one of this "weirdo" who actually loves to learn things, and for the record, I'm bullied and stressed out for making myself not to learn more and go with the flow to dumbness I had. Have you ever feel being assigned to some task where you know every process to make it easier and faster to finish but turns out to hesitate to voice out because some of your mates put themselves in charge. There are times where I know what to do, what to say, or how to react, but kept myself silent and pretend not to know anything that may help us. Maybe it's a good thing to just go with their ideas and learn from their perspectives, but sometimes you can't control it and says something, and once again called to be a weirdo and let you finish the work by yourself.
It's annoying that you only know one process yet they gave you the whole work and let you finish it by yourself because they insist that "MAGALING KA DIBA?". It's not your fault being an intellectual person, knowing such things that may help you to pursue your dreams, and have the basic knowledge about something. You don't need to know everything, just the basics. And as for those people who do not appreciate your existence, let them be and continue what's the best for you. In some cases, you'll be annoyed by this but most of the time you'll be thankful for it. Not for now but maybe later. Just be yourself either a weirdo, a great pretender, or a simple learner, and always remember to lower your voice and behavior because no one loves that.
Just be a great pretender not to hear any runts and be a good learner that appreciates everything. It's out of nowhere thoughts of mine, but simply I leave you this my favorite life quotation; "Don't introduce yourself, Let your success introduce you"
Dear me in six years, I wonder how life will treat you when you’re already 26 years old. Will you be financially stable? Will you be working in an advertising agency while pursuing everything about the arts? Will you be doing freelancing and living in a condo by then? I don’t know since things are very uncertain. I hope by the time you graduate from college and face the real meaning of the world, you’ll know what the real purpose of doing and living in the art will be.
I know it’s been so tough ever since you turned 20 but that’s how life works, I guess. There will be a lot of hopes and trials, breakdowns, and breakthroughs but I have high hopes of you becoming the better version of yourself. You always do, though. You were never a quitter. Making decisions is getting harder and harder as you grow but I hope it doesn’t make you stop doing what you really love to do. You will face different people with different perspectives. You will feel like a stranger once again, it’s like you were back in your freshmen year. It’s going to be tougher than you’ve expected but you can do it. I believe you can.
Most of the time, people's perception of us as a strong person makes us feel that we are not entitled to be vulnerable because they might be disappointed for seeing our weak spots. And so when we are hurting, we are often scared of extreme emotions and so bury our feelings. We deny them, trying to avoid the pain we feel.
But by doing that, we are just allowing it to come back to us and haunt us. And when it comes back, it might be stronger and it will be harder for us to get over it than when we faced them first. I realized it just now that facing those emotions will scare them until they're gone. The saying 'Let it hurt until it hurts no more' goes true. Admitting your pain to yourself doesn't make you weak. It only proves that you are strong enough to acknowledge such extreme emotions without avoiding them. We are humans and it's okay if we hurt sometimes.
Before, sliding over the rainbows
Now, our hearts are bruised
Days once full of love and laughter
Became dawns of forfeited ever after
Smiles that bring ticklish sensations
Turned to cold question and answer
Figuring who would be the next instructor
The queen’s awake
Grappling to the happiness that the sorrow and sadness take
Going back to all the promises he couldn’t make