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Single Since Birth—I Want To Try Dating But I Don’t Know Where To Start

Here are a few things that might help.
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Being single is a bliss. You get to focus on your own growth more and fulfill your #selflove2020 goals. But just because you enjoy and cherish the single life doesn’t mean you are automatically closing yourself off from all possibilities of ever dating in the near future. It’s okay to love your lonesomeness and still be interested in the idea of being in a relationship. If you’re a newbie to the whole dating concept, however, it might be daunting at first to actually try it out for yourself. In that case, here are a few things that might help.

Try dating apps.

Yes, mom, online dating is a thing now. And while you may have to exercise some caution as you swipe left and right, many relationships born out of dating apps actually thrive in the long run. Maybe it’s because there’s a higher chance for you to meet people you actually connect and share similar interests and quirks with through apps like these, but hey, you’d have to experience it for yourself to actually find out. 

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There are many apps on the market at the moment, and each have their own niche, so you’d really have to try them out to see which ones are more your taste. A word of warning though: You’d have to be extra careful with who you swipe right on, because not everyone has the same wholesome dating agenda as you. We also wouldn’t rule out a couple of mini heartbreaks when your potential online bae ghosts you out of the blue. But hey, every failed experience is a lesson learned, so you’ll know better next time.  

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Try doing something you’re actually interested in.

If meeting someone from a dating app just isn’t your thing, we get it. Maybe you’re someone who enjoys meeting people offline and bonding over mutual interests, and that’s totally fine. If that’s the case, why not get into something you’d actually enjoy doing? Join an org or volunteer for an event, go to a gig or try out a sport. These are just a few of the many ways you can meet people organically. Strike up a conversation with different people and get to know them better. The next thing you know, you might already be heading out for some afterschool coffee date or are already looking forward to the next gig you’re both attending. 

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Go out more and interact with people offline.

Many of us are homebodies and would rather binge-watch K-dramas, vlogs, and Instagram stories of people we barely even know (or is that just us?). But let’s be real, despite the convenience of being online almost 24/7 to slide into people’s DMs, nothing really compares to interacting with people IRL (sorry, Instagram and Messenger stans). If you’ve got the time to put yourself out there in the real world, literally, then this dating option might serve you well. 

The more you experience life without a screen in front of your face, the more you realize how equally essential offline social connections are. Real-life interaction with all sorts of people helps you practice your social skills in different settings, which might come in handy when it’s finally time for you to strike up a conversation with someone you like. Because as much as people appreciate “good morning” and “kumain ka na ba?” messages, there’s a lot more to know about your crush than whether or not they already ate their breakfast.

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Mylene Mendoza
Candy Staff Writer
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A Simple Learner Who's a Great Pretender

Maybe I'm just a learner, not a weirdo. A learner that knows how to listen and pretend. A simple learner who's a great pretender. Pretending to be slightly dumb enough not to be judged and criticized by those who do not appreciate my existence. We surround ourselves with people who's levels are either beyond or below our intellectual behavior, because as for reality, people may use you either for their success or your downfall. Since then, people tend to judge someone who has an intellect with things they shouldn't be. Making them a criticizer, and most of all, calling them weird.

Honestly, I'm one of this "weirdo" who actually loves to learn things, and for the record, I'm bullied and stressed out for making myself not to learn more and go with the flow to dumbness I had. Have you ever feel being assigned to some task where you know every process to make it easier and faster to finish but turns out to hesitate to voice out because some of your mates put themselves in charge. There are times where I know what to do, what to say, or how to react, but kept myself silent and pretend not to know anything that may help us. Maybe it's a good thing to just go with their ideas and learn from their perspectives, but sometimes you can't control it and says something, and once again called to be a weirdo and let you finish the work by yourself.

It's annoying that you only know one process yet they gave you the whole work and let you finish it by yourself because they insist that "MAGALING KA DIBA?". It's not your fault being an intellectual person, knowing such things that may help you to pursue your dreams, and have the basic knowledge about something. You don't need to know everything, just the basics. And as for those people who do not appreciate your existence, let them be and continue what's the best for you. In some cases, you'll be annoyed by this but most of the time you'll be thankful for it. Not for now but maybe later. Just be yourself either a weirdo, a great pretender, or a simple learner, and always remember to lower your voice and behavior because no one loves that.

Just be a great pretender not to hear any runts and be a good learner that appreciates everything. It's out of nowhere thoughts of mine, but simply I leave you this my favorite life quotation; "Don't introduce yourself, Let your success introduce you"

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