I'm Not Graduating with My Batchmates and That's Okay
Among the highlights of graduation is getting to graduate with your batch. You take your first nervous steps into the real world alongside the people you've spent the last couple of years with. You take those block photos, trade those graduation pictures, remind one other to meet up as often as possible. You graduate knowing that the people you're graduating alongside have suffered alongside you, and you feel thankful knowing that they're a part of this important milestone in your life.
But what if you aren't graduating with your batch?
I entered college back in 2012, under the impression that I'd be going through my commencement rights back in 2016. It is now 2017 and only now have I graduated, a full year behind my batch—my blockmates, my friends, the people I'd come to know as my second family. It's a lonely prospect, and it's an experience that I had to undergo.
But it's not all that bad, though.
The purpose of college
If you find yourself in the position of graduating without your batch, try to remember what college is for in the first place. The point of college isn't to see who can finish first. Rather, college is there for us to find ourselves and to grow into the people we want to be. For many, that's something that can be done in four years. That's fine. For others it takes a little longer, which is also fine.
If it takes you a little longer to explore and discover the field in which you are best fit, that is fine as long as you find it.
Keeping the purpose of college in mind will make that extra year far more bearable. We can talk about college being the place to find yourself, but that doesn't erase the fact that it can get pretty lonely graduating apart from your batchmates. Your batchmates are probably the ones you shared the most experiences with and being stuck in school without them can be a pretty melancholic experience. So how does one get past that feeling?
Together we walk
While you find that you haven't shared very many experiences with the batch you find yourself graduating alongside, that doesn't necessarily mean that you can't find a common ground. They may not have been the batch you entered college with, but they're students just as much as you are and have gone through similar experiences and shared similar worries and apprehensions, trials and jubilations. You'll find yourself sharing classes and schedules with these underclassmen, working on group projects and chasing deadlines alongside them, and you'll find that they aren't that different from yourself.
The idea that you really aren’t actually struggling on your own, but struggling with those struggling just as much as you are, will help you find comfort in the experience of graduating late.
They will eventually become just like those batch mates of yours who graduated ahead of you.
Have faith, and graduation will come
One reality that you have to accept when you find yourself taking on extra years is that, at that point, you may not really have much of a choice. Being worried about your chances of employment or your future beyond college may not have any effect at all on whether or not you graduate on time. More often than not, whatever worries you may have about graduating late may become nothing but a hindrance to you performing well and getting the most out of college.
To quote Newt Scamander from the recent Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, "Worrying means you suffer twice."
In the place of worrying over your delayed graduation, you could commit yourself to graduating in the best way you can manage. That extra year is a great chance for you to milk the remainder of your tertiary education experience—to boost your grades, to hone your skills, and to improve yourself in whatever ways may be available to you. Wallowing in self-pity and fear will keep you from doing these things. Instead of wallowing, you should focus yourself on doing the best you can with the time that is available. You will reap the fruits of your labour after that, regardless of your late graduation.
Some tips for the would-be delayed graduate
With all this having been said, here are some tips for surviving those extra years without your batchmates:
Focus on yourself. Take this time to find out what matters to you and where you want to go with your life. Make the most of the extra year, or years perhaps, of tertiary education.
Break down your walls and make friends. Keep in mind that, while the underclassmen may not be your batch mates, they're going through battles the same way you are. There’s comfort to be had there.
Have faith and continue to do your best. Your choices may be limited to taking that extra year or dropping out of college. Instead of letting your delayed graduation get you down, do your best in the time that is available. You’ll get to the finish line eventually, as long as you have confidence in yourself and set your mind on graduation.ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW
Finally, if the prospect of graduating without your batchmates still keeps you under the weather, remember that this is the age of social media. It honestly isn't hard to remain in contact with those who have graduated ahead of you. Most are a message away. As it is in any relationship, if you and your real batchmates are committed to one another, finding time for each other won't be a problem. Make time for them.
So go, take your fifth year and your sixth year if you must! Make the most out of your college experience, delayed graduation or not. Remember to enjoy college while it lasts—you'll be left with regrets if you don't.
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these sheets that exactly remind me of how I gushed in between my pillow and space you filled in the longing of my burned sorrow put smile to my sober face just like how a three year old receive her lollipop
i searched you everywhere and here you are laying down beside me in my imagination the walls that our screens built a boundary and an obvious message that says i can never have you because you wear clerical shirt and obviously you loved someone else before me
oh god, do I really want this forbidden love? that only exist in my imagination? that only exist through my words? would you, meine liebling, notice me and my art one second? because I am dying to say I love you.
A Simple Learner Who's a Great Pretender
Maybe I'm just a learner, not a weirdo. A learner that knows how to listen and pretend. A simple learner who's a great pretender. Pretending to be slightly dumb enough not to be judged and criticized by those who do not appreciate my existence. We surround ourselves with people who's levels are either beyond or below our intellectual behavior, because as for reality, people may use you either for their success or your downfall. Since then, people tend to judge someone who has an intellect with things they shouldn't be. Making them a criticizer, and most of all, calling them weird.
Honestly, I'm one of this "weirdo" who actually loves to learn things, and for the record, I'm bullied and stressed out for making myself not to learn more and go with the flow to dumbness I had. Have you ever feel being assigned to some task where you know every process to make it easier and faster to finish but turns out to hesitate to voice out because some of your mates put themselves in charge. There are times where I know what to do, what to say, or how to react, but kept myself silent and pretend not to know anything that may help us. Maybe it's a good thing to just go with their ideas and learn from their perspectives, but sometimes you can't control it and says something, and once again called to be a weirdo and let you finish the work by yourself.
It's annoying that you only know one process yet they gave you the whole work and let you finish it by yourself because they insist that "MAGALING KA DIBA?". It's not your fault being an intellectual person, knowing such things that may help you to pursue your dreams, and have the basic knowledge about something. You don't need to know everything, just the basics. And as for those people who do not appreciate your existence, let them be and continue what's the best for you. In some cases, you'll be annoyed by this but most of the time you'll be thankful for it. Not for now but maybe later. Just be yourself either a weirdo, a great pretender, or a simple learner, and always remember to lower your voice and behavior because no one loves that.
Just be a great pretender not to hear any runts and be a good learner that appreciates everything. It's out of nowhere thoughts of mine, but simply I leave you this my favorite life quotation; "Don't introduce yourself, Let your success introduce you"
Dear me in six years, I wonder how life will treat you when you’re already 26 years old. Will you be financially stable? Will you be working in an advertising agency while pursuing everything about the arts? Will you be doing freelancing and living in a condo by then? I don’t know since things are very uncertain. I hope by the time you graduate from college and face the real meaning of the world, you’ll know what the real purpose of doing and living in the art will be.
I know it’s been so tough ever since you turned 20 but that’s how life works, I guess. There will be a lot of hopes and trials, breakdowns, and breakthroughs but I have high hopes of you becoming the better version of yourself. You always do, though. You were never a quitter. Making decisions is getting harder and harder as you grow but I hope it doesn’t make you stop doing what you really love to do. You will face different people with different perspectives. You will feel like a stranger once again, it’s like you were back in your freshmen year. It’s going to be tougher than you’ve expected but you can do it. I believe you can.
Most of the time, people's perception of us as a strong person makes us feel that we are not entitled to be vulnerable because they might be disappointed for seeing our weak spots. And so when we are hurting, we are often scared of extreme emotions and so bury our feelings. We deny them, trying to avoid the pain we feel.
But by doing that, we are just allowing it to come back to us and haunt us. And when it comes back, it might be stronger and it will be harder for us to get over it than when we faced them first. I realized it just now that facing those emotions will scare them until they're gone. The saying 'Let it hurt until it hurts no more' goes true. Admitting your pain to yourself doesn't make you weak. It only proves that you are strong enough to acknowledge such extreme emotions without avoiding them. We are humans and it's okay if we hurt sometimes.
Before, sliding over the rainbows
Now, our hearts are bruised
Days once full of love and laughter
Became dawns of forfeited ever after
Smiles that bring ticklish sensations
Turned to cold question and answer
Figuring who would be the next instructor
The queen’s awake
Grappling to the happiness that the sorrow and sadness take
Going back to all the promises he couldn’t make
Poetry #2: YOUR VOICE
When you talk, your voice brightens my days. You provide me comfort in all the little things that you do. Your deep and mellow voice sends a tingling feeling inside me that makes me want to keep you in my life. I love talking to you every time, every day, every night and every minute if I could. You're someone just simply amazing.