How to Take Care of an Insecure Girl

Inescurity is a battle no one should fight alone.
by Mira Blancada   |  Feb 5, 2017
Image: ABC Family
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Being insecure is normal, but it's something you shouldn't keep around for a long time. So if you have a friend who's having a hard time dealing with her insecurities, it's time to help her. This is a battle she shouldn't fight alone. 

  1. Compliment her every now and then.

Compliments are great to boost someone's self esteem. Whether it's about her new hairstyle that suits her perfectly or her eyebrows that are on fleek, don't hesitate to give her a compliment.

Guys, take note: Make her feel beautiful, tell her that the pink dress looks good on her. But make sure you're not overdoing it. If you're going to give her a compliment, give it when you really mean it. Don't just give her one because you want her to be happy.

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  1. Give her reassurance.

Reassure her that you always have her back and that you're a true friend. Insecure girls sometimes think her friends will leave her once she does something wrong, so they mostly stay guarded.


Guys, take note: Reassure her that you're committed to your relationship. Insecure girls have trust issues, whether it's because of her ex or an old friend. They get jealous easily, and sometimes think that every girl you're with will take you away from her. If she seemingly acts irrational, take some time to talk to her rather than being upset about it.

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  1. Respect her boundaries.

Insecure girls mostly follow what their friends want, just because she doesn't wanna lose them. So you've to let her know that it's normal to have different tastes in music, movies, clothes, and food. And you're willing to respect those boundaries.

Guys, take note: If holding hands is off-limits for her, be sure to respect it. There are reasons why she doesn't like the idea, so assure her that you won't force her to do anything she doesn't like. Wait for her to get comfortable with the idea first.


  1. Understand her perspective.

Listen to what's bothering her and don't be judgmental. There will be times when she gets affected by a joke or a statement easily, even though it means nothing to you. Put yourself in her shoes, may it be about school, friends, family, or herself.

Guys, take note: Don't add up to the problem. Insecure girls are more vulnerable than you think they are. Arguing is normal; we know you have your own feelings, too. But try to be more understanding instead of pressing the issue.  

  1. Ask her if she's okay.

Yes, there may be days when you just really can't. But at least let her know that you can talk afterwards. Insecure girls may not always want to talk about what's bothering them because they're afraid to burden other people, so it's nice to know that she trusts you because there may be days you also need someone to talk to.


Guys, take note: Let her vent to you because just like everybody else, when she gets her worries off her chest, it will make dealing with it a lot easier. Help her feel more secure, protected, and confident.

  1. Make her feel appreciated.

Appreciate the things she's doing for you or the barkada, like when she shares her food with you or when she lets you borrow her favorite things for an important occasion. Saying "thank you" or "I appreciate it" shouldn't be that hard. 

Guys, take note: She's your girlfriend and she's insecure. Whether it's a big thing or a small one, make her feel that you appreciate everything she does for you. 

  1. Encourage her to focus on the positive.

Lets be real, you're not always going to be there for her. There will be days when you have to prioritize other things more than looking out for her. Make sure your optimistic side rubs off on her, so even if you're not around, she'll still be able to manage and look at the positive side of things.  


Guys, take note: Insecure girls are also over-thinkers. If your girlfriend is kind of pessimistic, help her focus on the positive. There's always a silver lining in every negative situation, help her find that.

  1. Make her feel she's not alone.

In reality, it needs patience to deal with an insecure girl, so make her feel that you'll always have her back. Be the light to your insecure friend, we need more of that in this world.

Guys, take note: She chose you for a reason, she loved you for a reason. Honestly, everyone is hard to deal with; so what makes her different, then? You know that she's worth it, but she doesn't know that. Let her know that she's not alone in this battle. Don't let her be beat up by her insecurities.

How do you deal with your friend who's insecure? Or if you feel this way sometimes, how do you want to be approached? Let's talk!

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