How To Step Up—Your Way

What to do when there's nowhere to go but forward? Move at your own pace—with progress at your feet!
by Lora Gahol   |  Jun 13, 2010
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The Dan-Vanessa Dilemma-ed Best Friend

So you’ve known him since the days when mud was an acceptable food group and when rollerblades were the height of coolness. So you swore off the possibility of your hygiene challenged burp-and-fart-factory of a best bud turning into a dreamboat after one summer in Florida. So you’ve kicked yourself many times for ignoring the Valentine he gave you in fourth grade. So you’ve obviously caught the love fever—and your best friend-slash-man-of-your-dreams can either be the one you’ll be quarantined with, or the one you’ll be quarantined from. And it’s all up to you. Don’t just hopelessly sigh behind his back.


Throw the rule book out the window—and do something about it! Because the worst thing about falling in love with your best bud is that he knows you sooo well, he’ll inevitably feel something’s up—whether you tell him or not.



The Litany of Doubt: What if he rejects me? Will our friendship be ruined? Does he even think we can be “more than friends”? What if he gets so ilang, he avoids me for the rest of our lives?


Baby steps to the BIG leap: Alright. It helps to have at least a bit of love insurance in this particular case. Face it—there’s a risk of the situation turning into an all-or-nothing deal. So what’s a smitten best friend to do? Watch for little “signs” before your heart takes the plunge. We’re not talking signs of John Cusack-Kate Beckinsale-slash-Serendipity magnitude; a tender look deep within his eyes or giving up his jacket for you to wear when it’s cold can spell the difference between boy friend and boyfriend. And while you should start wearing more of your heart on your sleeve, we don’t suggest you run up to him and profess undying love in the middle of his basketball game. Slowly come clean with your feelings by doing the little things that will spell out the difference for him as well; send him a care package when he catches a cold, or rent him a DVD of an old movie he’s been dying to see. If he responds with an uncharacteristic smile and hug in place of his usual, “Anong nakain mo, Panget?!” when you do something nice for him, then a romantic future is not too far ahead. Then talk to him. Just like that. No profound speeches, no candlelight, no violin music in the background. Breaking the news on Burger Friday when you have your usual grease-fest is as good a time as any; it’s comfortable, natural, and real—just what guys look for in a girlfriend... And, what he just might realize, he’s already found in you. 

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About the author
Lora Gahol
Contributing Writer
"Parang iniisip ng mga tao na mataray ako, suplado, but actually may nafi-feel kasi ako sa umaga na bigat."