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How To Plan Your Own Debut Without Hurting Your Parents' Feelings

Events specialist Marex Gaba shares what to do when parents are overbearing in planning your event.
PHOTO Flickr.com

Planning your debut is one fun adventure, but it's something you can't do alone. Luckily for you, your family and friends will surely be more than willing to help you out. Sometimes though, the people around you—like your folks—become too excited for you that they start to impose their ideas. What do you do if they become overbearing in planning your debut? You surely want your debut to reflect your personality, so how do you tell them to give you more freedom to plan your event without hurting their feelings?

We asked party planner extraordinaire Marex Gaba, who's had more than a decade's worth of experience in events planning fabulously elegant, well-designed, and totally hassle-free events, to address your dilemma. 

Marex's answer: 
If there's anybody who knows how to best talk to your parents, it's you. You need to have a heart-to-heart talk with them, but not in an intervention kind of way. Tell them how much you love them and how much you appreciate their involvement in the debut preparations, but also explain to them how important it is to you to make your own choices. You are, after all, turning into a lady!

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Explain to them that you want to be very much involved in deciding on how your debut party will look and feel. I'm sure your parents have the best intentions, and their wanting to make everything grand is because they truly love you and they're overwhelmed with pride and joy. Hear them out. They may have wonderful ideas that might interest you.

Don't make them feel like all their suggestions are not welcome. If there's something you disagree on, be patient in clearly explaining your side. If they become insistent, tell them politely that you have your ideas, too. Then, regardless of what you decide to do, get back to them and give them updates, so they'll feel that you really give them importance.

I feel for you. It's your debut. But you also have to learn to somehow compromise, especially in this situation.

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