How To Deal With Toxic Relationships
The Toxic Boyfriend
Scientific Name: Toxicus Massivus Jealousitis
Symptoms: Delusional, is under the impression that there is no such thing as a platonic male friend and that if you sit beside a male classmate, you’re cheating on him; controlling, thinks being his girlfriend involves love, loyalty, and a nine o’clock curfew; nosy, thinks privacy is exclusive to single people and no longer applies to both of you as a couple.
Causes: Since jealousy is caused by insecurity, chances are your boyfriend is acting out his own feelings of inadequacy. He may feel that he isn’t good enough for you, and given the opportunity, you will replace him with someone else, or maybe in the past, he was burned and his previous girlfriend cheated on him.
Treatment: It is important not to give in to everything your boyfriend asks for. Remember that although love calls for sacrifice, there are limits to what you should give up. It is healthy to have platonic male friends and to occasionally spend time with other people aside from your boyfriend. Time away from each other will give you the opportunity to miss each other and appreciate each other’s company more.
The best course of action is to talk to your boyfriend. Make sure that the lines of communication are always open. Ask him why he is so strict and overbearing, and explain why you need more space. Be sensitive and don’t constantly bring up other guys or old flames, especially when you fight. If he has come from a relationship in which his ex-girlfriend cheated on him, assure him that you are not going to do the same thing. Let him know he is your first and only choice: “If I could have any guy in the world from Tobey Maguire to Justin Timberlake, I would still choose you.”
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