How Being "Weird" Made Me Succeed in School and in Life
People try so hard to mask their own kind of weird because they hunger for acceptance. What's truly sad about this is that they yearn for other people's acceptance more than their own by trying to fit into a mold that's clearly not for them. When I ask people, "what's so wrong about not being like the rest?", no one can really give me a straight answer. Most of them brush me off by saying, "just because." I have never once thought that each and every human was meant to be same, because really, where's the fun in that?
I grew up surrounded by people who can't help but constantly dictate what is acceptable and what is not. I have had teachers who would struggle to condition my behavior in a way they saw fit because it was embarrassing and unacceptable for a girl to act otherwise. They had their own standards which completely disregarded any choice or preference I may have had. To them,
I am weird because I have an unladylike and boisterous laugh.
I am weird because I was never attracted to the idea of being a cheerleader.
I am weird because I would spend my lunch breaks in the library instead of the cafeteria.
Luckily, my family has never been one to agree. I inherited my father's laugh, and my mother's uncanny inability to dance, and just then, my sister turned me into a bookworm. They all encourage each other to foster whatever weirdness is there, because it is precisely that weirdness that makes you distinguished from the rest.
Oftentimes, my mom would say, "If your choices don't hurt anyone, then there'snothing wrong with them."
True story: My section adviser called up my mother once to tell her that she did not like the way my bangs were cut and that I should get rid of them.
At that time, I was young, and I had decided to cut my own bangs because the hairdresser never got it right. And honestly, I didn't think they looked that bad. My mother even said they looked nice. What was funnier to me was that I never knew teachers had a say in my hair choices.
Honestly speaking, the more people argued against my choices, the more I wanted to stick by them. It's not because I wanted to be a rebel, but because from a very early age, I was raised to to fight for what I want and for what I believe in. I think that if you constantly fluctuate between what you want and what society wants, you never really have a clear vision of who you are. The line between who you really want to be and what society wants you be to be becomes blurred. If I don't see anything wrong with my decisions, what did it matter to them? Not once did I conform to what my teachers and peers saw as "normal", unless, you know, I was about to get sanctioned.
I think that if you constantly fluctuate between what you want and what society wants, you never really have a clear vision of who you are. The line between who you really want to be and what society wants you be to be becomes blurred. If I don't see anything wrong with my decisions, what did it matter to them?ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW
Years later, this "weirdness" got me into one of the country's top universities, landed me a spot in a batch of Candy Correspondents, and pushed me into making an online magazine for young and unrecognized talent. When people approach me and ask why I decided to give life to Rumination, I never really know what answer to give them except "because it felt right." Even though it has garnered a loyal following, there are still people who are not so fond of the idea. They tell me that it's just a waste of my time because I don't make money out of it and that I am wasting all my energy when I should be studying hard in school. Though funnily enough, my grades even got higher after I started Rumination. It had never felt like a burden to me because it was something I loved to do—I didn't think of it as work, but rather an escape from school.
I live life comfortably, and without any regrets because I'm not spending all my time thinking of ways I could earn acceptance and validation from society. I do what I what I think is right, entertaining and fun because I don't know how to do it any other way.
To this very day, I would still rather stay at home and play Harvest Moon than go out and party. Whenever I do end up going out, the thing I look forward to the most is the post-party McDonald's drive-thru. Not that I'm saying these preferences are weird, but it is because of choices like these that I am dubbed as killjoy, unusual, and strange. In reality, the only basis society has for being "weird" is when your preferences don't align with that of others'.
There is nothing society hates more than something it cannot understand. That's why our mouths are so loose with spewing out labels such as weirdo, freak, or misfit.ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW
We are all weird, so to speak—we just have different brands of weird.
When in doubt, think of it this way: when people try to force you into this mold that clearly doesn't fit, it is not them who get hurt, it's you.
If being "weird" means not sharing the same preferences and interests with the majority, then I'll live. I don't know about you but I would much rather be called weird than generic. There is no greater insult than being thought of as common and replaceable. No one is ever fascinated with what is normal because people remember the eccentric. Now, when someone calls me "weird", I smile because I know I'm doing me right.
Had I not stuck with my brand of weirdness, I wouldn't not be where I am now—with a solid set of friends who are just as weird as me, interesting career opportunities. Things are different now, but in a good way. For one, I'm no longer sporting bangs.
What're you up to today? Submit your OOTD, fanfic, essay, school project, org event, a pic of your latest hobby, or anything you want to be posted on the Candy Bulletin page!
There was this guy I dated for a while but things didn't turn out well. I was so into him that one night I can't stop thinking about him, I've decided to send his MOM a message on facebook confessing how much I like her son. I wish it ended there but no. I had to make it so emotional, lengthy and detailed like the drama queen I am. Luckily, it went to message request so I'm hoping she hasn't really read it yet. Up until this day it makes me cringe whenever I think about it but hey, whenever it pops in my mind I make myself laugh too so thank you self for being unbelievably shameless and brave when it comes to love. I may age faster because I have made a lot of cringe-worthy moments that I constantly make faces out of embarrassment just reflecting on my antics but I know I've made more hilarious memories than what ifs and somehow that makes the disappointments feel more like assurances that I have gave it my all and I have lived as honest (maybe a little to honest) as I could. #ItsOnlyNatural #CanBnatural
I've been investing in arts, photography, and writing. I've also got back to reading the other day and I finished reading this amazing book entitled 300 Things I Hope by Iain S. Thomas. It is all about the things the author hopes his readers to do in all aspects of life. So, I decided to make a version of it with all of the things I'm hoping for.
I hope I get to see my friends be successful in life. I hope to make a big mural someday. I hope to be a well-known artist like the artists I look up to. I hope to marry the person I am in love with today. I hope to be a little kinder to myself. I hope to see happiness even in the smallest things. I hope to travel the world. I hope to be a good mother and a wife to my future family. I hope to have my artworks displayed in a gallery or an exhibit. I hope to learn more about creative writing. I hope I won't learn how to get tired and give up my passion. I hope I won't get too hard on myself whenever I don't get the results I've been wanting to see in my works. I hope to love myself more even on the days I hate it the most. I hope to lead and empower women; to be their voice and for them to believe in themselves that they can be the woman they look up to. And when I've reached my limit of these things, I hope I won't get tired of reminding myself that my emotions don't make me weak, hence, makes me stronger. These are some of the things I always hope for. What about you? What are you hoping for?
I started fixing myself this quarantine. I mean, I started trying makeup products. As a teen, I'm on my phone almost every hour of the day, scroll on my social media accounts, especially Instagram, and also Pinterest where you get to see nice and pleasing photography by bunch of amazing and beautiful people from different parts of the world. So I started taking my own as well. I did not know that taking your own photo and try to get an Instagramable one is sooooooooo hard, it's exhausting. I do not have alot of space in my room, and I would definitely not do it outside our house because of Corona Virus, and I don't want to be seen by our neighbors HAHA so I have no choice but to make tiis inside my room.
Out of atleast 25 shots, only 2 are a nice picture. While I'm all sweaty and tired, I am proud of what I could do beyond my comfort zone. And this definitely built my self confidence, (and I secret love the compliments I received from both people I know and don't know) It's not my first time visiting in here, Candy! But I'm new to writing my thoughts and experiences, so bare with me HAHA.
Until next time!