I was perfectly fine before you came. The calm before the storm as one would say. My life was unusually tranquil. I was unaware of the hurricane that was coming my way.
You entered just like any storm. It started out with light rain and cool winds. They warned me about you and told me to expect the worst out of you. They warned me about the mess that you were about to make. But I disregarded their warnings because I thought you were harmless and I felt excited for the change that you were about to bring. I was excited because I thought you being here would mean cozy nights, a chance to wear clothes that I rarely get to wear. It meant a whole new ambience. I was beyond ecstatic.
You built up just like any storm. Slowly gaining speed and strength with the help of the wind. And without any kind of warning, I was suddenly caught in the eye of the storm. I held on for dear life. Don't get me wrong, you surprisingly brought a few unexpected sunny days, I was very very very grateful for those. I honestly thought those sunny days would last, only to find out that the raging side of you would come back, wilder and much stronger.
I was so close to succumbing to the storm, but then you suddenly left. You went to another person's area of responsibility. And just like the aftermath of any storm, I felt relieved, but with that relief I felt dismay. I was relieved because when you left, it meant the end of the strong rainshowers and raging winds. It meant new beginnings and the end of a disturbing era.
But you made a mess. I was about to clean up your mess. I was about to clean the mess you made out of me. You came in and shattered my windows, broke my walls, and left me all by myself, with no one to help me pick up and fix the broken pieces. You left me devastated.
I knew that I was at fault though. I knew that I was fully responsible for all the things that had happened because I disregarded their warnings. I didn't take the necessary precautions and decided to brave the storm without any gear and armor to help me survive the storm. I did survive though, but just barely. I was left with virtually nothing but myself after that storm.
READ: Maybe I Cared Too Much
I was grateful for your devastating visit though. I was thankful because if it weren't for you, I wouldn't have learned my lesson. I wouldn't have armed myself with the gear and the strength to help me get through the next storm that would come my way. I wouldn't have realized that I shouldn't take everyone's warnings lightly.
So thank you for stopping by. Your visit was quite unpleasant, it may have left me broken in the end, but thank you. Thank you for these battle scars. I know that someday these scars will fade and more storms will probably come my way. They will make a mess out of me, they will add more scars. But that's alright, thanks to you, now I know that I'm strong enough to get through these storms.
Karla Gabrielle Trillanes blogs at karla-speaks.tumblr.com. Got your own story to tell? Drop us an email at candymagazine @gmail.com! We'd love to hear what you have to say. If you're lucky, you just might get published in this space, too! Please indicate if you want to remain anonymous. We're also looking for artwork and illustrations to use with the stories, so please send some in if you want to be featured!