"Let's end this." These were the last words I uttered before I turned my back on you. It's been more than 5 years, but the pain in your eyes still haunts me. Everything that you have done for me still lingers in my memory.
I feel awful whenever I remember those times when you just wanted nothing but the best for me. You were the only guy who courageously faced and loved my parents. And you're the only guy they loved back. The only guy who wasn't ashamed to scream to the world how much he loves me. The only guy who never argued with me, the guy who did nothing but hold my hand and hug me every time I threw my tantrums when I didn't get something. At that time, I was blind and I was selfish. Selfish because I gave you nothing pain.
I'm really sorry. Sorry for breaking your heart. I'm sorry if I took you for granted when all you did was love me sincerely. I'm sorry if I locked you up in pain for years. God knows how I regret that night when I turned my back on you and left you crying.
I wish I just stayed. I wish I just loved you more than you have loved me because you deserve it. I wish I knew I already had the best.
But it's different now. You are different, things are different now. And it hurts me. It hurts to know that things can never go back to the way they were. But I know this pain is not enough compared to what I have done to you. If God will give me another chance to get you back, I can't promise I will not hurt you again because chances are I will. But when that day comes, what I will make sure is this: I will hold your hand, never let go, and do my best to make things right.
Written by Mia Manansala.