From Our Readers: To the Guy I Called My First Love
I was in love with you. Or maybe I was in love with the thought of loving you. We've been friends for almost six years and through those years, I always had this crush on you. But I never admitted it because I was either afraid that it might ruin our friendship or that you might already be in a relationship.
The day we had a big fight over our friendship was the day you confronted me and told me you have always loved me. I was extremely happy and at the same terrified of what you said. I didn't know what to do with us. Was I suppose to take the information to a whole new level and put us into the category of being more than friends and risk our friendship or simply just continue being friends with you and just forget what you said.
We talked about it and from then on you reassured me that you'll be gentle with me and that you'll guard my heart like your life depended on it. I believed what you said. I trusted your words since you're my bestfriend. You know the things I hate, the things I love, and the things that could hurt me. You were my first love and I thought I couldn't ask for a better guy but I was wrong.
I knew what kind of a guy you are. I knew that you're a player and you liked playing with girls' hearts. You were insecure because you thought no one could love you. I knew how you would work your charms to woo girls. I knew how you could make a fall in love with a girl with you and make her feel special for a while and then forget her like it's nothing. I knew all those things yet I trusted you with my heart, having the faith that you won't do the same to me. I believed that you were a charismatic guy and maybe deep down inside, I wanted to help you change the way you treated girls.
I thought I was different from all the girls you dated and called your girlfriend. I thought you wouldn't play with my heart, but I was wrong. For the past year we dated, I was always in tears and very much in pain. There were times I wanted to give up on us, but you worked your charms and sweet soothing words on me. The last three months of our relationship were the toughest. I learned all about you courting your ex-girlfriend while you were still with me and how you were even courting another different girl. That was the last straw; I gave up on you. I gave up on us. I cried a lot during the times I learned that you were cheating, but as time passed, I saw that you never treated me as a precious jewel. You never treated me like a princess and all you ever brought me was pain.
The day I gave up was the day I was truly happy. I felt like a weight was lifted from my shoulders. It seems like I have moved on fast since two months after our breakup, I found a new guy. But I realized that I was never happy in your arms and I was never treated right. Thanks for showing me the two kinds of guys in this world. Thank you that even though our friendship will never be the same, you showed me a glimpse of what love is.
Written by Red Chinny.
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It has always been a dream of mine to be featured in candy magazine. Currently, there is something I want to share. As a BS Biology incoming sophomore, our midyear GE Math 10 professor asked us to write a poem with the use of math concepts. A Fibonacci poem follows the Fibonacci sequence and you can count by word or syllable.
I chose this poem about the self and I wrote this with the particular sequence which corresponds to the number of syllables in each line: 1,1,2,3,5,8,13,21,34,55.
Hope anyone who gets to read this will enjoy and appreciate math as a subject that it can as well be employed in many real-life applications including expressing oneself through literature ?? Great thanks!
“You May Not see The secrets That behold magic In you but oh darling you hold Much wonder within. The roar of the lion might make You feel small. At the moment you deem you are nothing at all, just tell yourself, “I am Part of the universal call”.
Because at the end of the day the blood coursing your veins, the library you have for a heart and the stars In your eyes matter to anyone who peeks through your soul. Don’t wait for a morrow that never comes or atoms of the buried past but appreciate all that is now and you will enchant the world with your train of thoughts and smile. :)”
these sheets that exactly remind me of how I gushed in between my pillow and space you filled in the longing of my burned sorrow put smile to my sober face just like how a three year old receive her lollipop
i searched you everywhere and here you are laying down beside me in my imagination the walls that our screens built a boundary and an obvious message that says i can never have you because you wear clerical shirt and obviously you loved someone else before me
oh god, do I really want this forbidden love? that only exist in my imagination? that only exist through my words? would you, meine liebling, notice me and my art one second? because I am dying to say I love you.
A Simple Learner Who's a Great Pretender
Maybe I'm just a learner, not a weirdo. A learner that knows how to listen and pretend. A simple learner who's a great pretender. Pretending to be slightly dumb enough not to be judged and criticized by those who do not appreciate my existence. We surround ourselves with people who's levels are either beyond or below our intellectual behavior, because as for reality, people may use you either for their success or your downfall. Since then, people tend to judge someone who has an intellect with things they shouldn't be. Making them a criticizer, and most of all, calling them weird.
Honestly, I'm one of this "weirdo" who actually loves to learn things, and for the record, I'm bullied and stressed out for making myself not to learn more and go with the flow to dumbness I had. Have you ever feel being assigned to some task where you know every process to make it easier and faster to finish but turns out to hesitate to voice out because some of your mates put themselves in charge. There are times where I know what to do, what to say, or how to react, but kept myself silent and pretend not to know anything that may help us. Maybe it's a good thing to just go with their ideas and learn from their perspectives, but sometimes you can't control it and says something, and once again called to be a weirdo and let you finish the work by yourself.
It's annoying that you only know one process yet they gave you the whole work and let you finish it by yourself because they insist that "MAGALING KA DIBA?". It's not your fault being an intellectual person, knowing such things that may help you to pursue your dreams, and have the basic knowledge about something. You don't need to know everything, just the basics. And as for those people who do not appreciate your existence, let them be and continue what's the best for you. In some cases, you'll be annoyed by this but most of the time you'll be thankful for it. Not for now but maybe later. Just be yourself either a weirdo, a great pretender, or a simple learner, and always remember to lower your voice and behavior because no one loves that.
Just be a great pretender not to hear any runts and be a good learner that appreciates everything. It's out of nowhere thoughts of mine, but simply I leave you this my favorite life quotation; "Don't introduce yourself, Let your success introduce you"
Dear me in six years, I wonder how life will treat you when you’re already 26 years old. Will you be financially stable? Will you be working in an advertising agency while pursuing everything about the arts? Will you be doing freelancing and living in a condo by then? I don’t know since things are very uncertain. I hope by the time you graduate from college and face the real meaning of the world, you’ll know what the real purpose of doing and living in the art will be.
I know it’s been so tough ever since you turned 20 but that’s how life works, I guess. There will be a lot of hopes and trials, breakdowns, and breakthroughs but I have high hopes of you becoming the better version of yourself. You always do, though. You were never a quitter. Making decisions is getting harder and harder as you grow but I hope it doesn’t make you stop doing what you really love to do. You will face different people with different perspectives. You will feel like a stranger once again, it’s like you were back in your freshmen year. It’s going to be tougher than you’ve expected but you can do it. I believe you can.