You might remember how we met less than three years ago. We were in the same class that I've never taken before. You were always the quiet one and I was always the loud one, which is why we never matched. Nevertheless, you had always caught my attention. You were the one who always got better grades. You were the one girls kept an eye on, including me.
Years went on, we would still see each other in the hallways, barely showing each other attention. But you don't know how many times I glanced at your direction just to get a glimpse of you. I don't know how it happened. Every time I'd see you, I would always want to get your eyes on me, just to know that at some point I actually caught your attention. Well, I guess I'll never know.
Until one day, we exchanged tweets as if we were actually friends. In that moment I thought I could actually have a place in your life, or at least I was assured that maybe we could be friends.
I told some of my friends I had a crush on you,but I never really told them how much I really, really liked you. I've always hidden my blushing cheeks whenever you're around, because I never wanted you to know.
I don't really want to pursue these feelings. I know my place and that will never be in your heart. You've been seeing this girl whose name is the only thing I know about. I even thought you were officially together. Yet a few days ago, I found out that she ditched you, that you were just her second choice. I felt so broken inside. I wasn't even the one estranged, was I? But because I know how it feels to be left behind; I know that it hurts so much that you can no longer breathe and you wonder if the pain will ever fade away. You ask yourself what went wrong that she suddenly turned cold, but all you get is a question left unanswered. You wish things would just go back to the way they were. You blink multiple times just to check if all of this was a dream, but nothing changes.
I want to show you I'm here, but how can I do that if we don't even talk? I want to tell you how much I like you, how much I want to be with you. But how can I, if every time I look at you, I get butterflies in my stomach? How can I mend your heart when you won't even let me bring the broken pieces back together?
READ: To My Ex-Best Friend
They say people come and go. They leave because you deserve someone better. I'm not saying it's me. But I can be, if you only let me.
From The Girl Next Door
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