My best friend and I were really like sisters. We had a lot of dreams together for the future. I even said to myself back then that I wanted her as my maid of honor when I get married someday. We get each other just by one look, we were automatically partners during school activities. We would watch all the movies at the cinema when we have free time. Our thoughts about other people were always in sync. She was there when I got my heart broken for the very first time, but I didn't see it coming that she would be the reason for the second time, which hurt me more. That was when she found new friends and forgot about me. She was already living in a world where I wasn't invited in.
It hurt when she stopped reserving seats for me when I came in late for our classes and started eating out for lunch with her new besties. I felt like I needed to start all over again like my first day in school before I met her. It was a punch in the stomach to bump into her in the hallway without greeting each other. I was mad at her for choosing any other people over me, for suddenly leaving me behind. I couldn't understand it at first and I kept on asking myself if our friendship even mattered to her. I know boyfriends may come and go but not best friends. I was never prepared for that kind of breakup.
But as I got used to it, I started realizing that maybe it's time we drift ways and grow apart and maybe it’s the kind of friendship that’s not meant to last. It just made me sad that the person I rely on the most did not feel the same way about me anymore. We've ignored each other from then on. We were like strangers again. It just happened and that's the worst I've ever felt. It’s the worst because I felt like I needed to look for another partner-in-crime and soulmate again. It was like losing my better half. But despite everything that has happened, I really am happy to see my old best friend have the time of her life. I still want to play the part of being a true friend to her by supporting her with what makes her heart happy. And if she ever gets her heart broken, too, I would also want to be there for her even if it’s not the same anymore.
READ: To My Ex-Best Friend
Written by Therese Baquilar. Got your own story to tell? Drop us an email at candymagazine @gmail.com! We'd love to hear what you have to say. If you're lucky, you just might get published in this space, too!