From Our Readers: But You Won't Let Me
I want to be the person you think about before you fall asleep at night, and the one you're grateful for the moment you wake up every single day. I want to be the one who tells you jokes you don't understand, but make you laugh anyway. I want to be there for you when you lose someone or something, those times you think is the end of life as you know it. And when the days pass by so fast, you're so scared you want to run away, I want to be the one who tells you it will all be okay.
I want to be the person you tell your secrets to. And when you're out of secrets, we can make new ones, just for the two of us. I want to be someone you would tell your hopes and dreams to, the one who'd say I believe in you, and I know you can do it. I want to be someone who'd shut up and just listen when you feel like talking, and make you some tea. I want to be there for you when you're the happiest person in the world, when you're having a wonderful day. And when you hear the most awful joke you've ever heard, I want to be the first one you'd want tell it to, even if I wouldn't get it the first time you do.
I want to be there when you're lonely, when you're angry, and when you're happy. I want to be the person who agrees and disagrees with you, the one who argues with you, the one who laughs at you. I want to be the answer to when you're asked who you'd want to spend your last day on Earth with. I want to hold your hand when there's bad news, and sit with you when there's nothing else to do but watch time pass by. I want to be the one who asks you about your day, and the one who reminds you to eat every time you look my way.
I want to pray with you, be one with the Universe with you. I want to be the person who cares about you the most, and who'd give everything up for you. I want to be someone you would drop everything for and be the one who'd drop everything for you too. I want to be grateful with you, I want to be that person who holds your hand when there's a rainbow or a shooting star or a funny new video on YouTube. I want to be the one who makes you feel wanted, the one who makes you feel needed, more than anything in the world, I want to be the person who makes you feel loved. I want to cheer you on, make you feel like you can do anything you want. I want be the one who sings for you, the one who'd treat you well. I want to be the person who waits for you to come home, and the one who makes you feel that you're never alone.
I want to love you and be the person you love. I want to be enough, I want to feel important to you and make you feel important. I want to be there for you, but you have your walls up so high, I don't know if I should start climbing, or if I should just wait for you to help me tear them down. I want to be the person who'd be there when you finally open your eyes. I want to be the one who'd be holding up a sign with your name on it, and a few tiny hearts. I want to be the person you miss, the one who makes you feel like the luckiest man alive, I want to be the one who makes you nervous and makes you worry. I want the idea of me leaving to scare the crap out of you. I want to be your soulmate, the one you can never live without. I want to take care of you, and be there in every moment of your life. I want to love you and be the person you love for the rest of our lives. But you won't let me.
Mary Elizabeth Francisco blogs at marshmary.com. Got your own story to tell? Drop us an email at candymagazine @gmail.com! We'd love to hear what you have to say. If you're lucky, you just might get published in this space, too! Please indicate if you want to remain anonymous. We're also looking for artwork and illustrations to use with the stories, so please send some in if you want to be featured!