Help—My Friend Needs To Vent But I'm Swamped With Acads

When we've fostered healthy relationships, we shouldn't forget to take care of them, no matter how hectic our schedules can be.
by Mylene Mendoza   |  Jan 16, 2020
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Do you ever just find yourself wishing you had duplicates of yourself—one to go to class for you, another to go hang out with friends? TBH, same. But the real world doesn’t work that way and we wake up having to deal with all our responsibilities by ourselves and ditch hanging out with friends a number of times to keep up.

While we know that real friends would understand and respect that school is our number one priority, it’s still not enough of a reason to entirely neglect our relationship with them, especially when they need us. If you find yourself in this sticky situation, here are some things to keep in mind:

Avoid offering to listen to a friend if you can’t devote your full attention to them.

While it’s important to allot some time for our friends in order to nurture our relationships with them, we shouldn’t say we’re there for them to talk if we’re just going to end up being half-attentive to what they have to share. Before you invite that friend over to vent to you while you’re reviewing for an exam, make sure you have the mental capacity to be present in the moment as they pour their heart out to you. If this isn’t possible, maybe you should schedule a separate catch-up session with your friend some other time, when you're finally free. Otherwise, it’s only going to be a waste of both your time and effort, and the attempt might just come off as insincere.


Take note: You might need a break from being busy, too.

Having your entire life revolve around school—from your academic requirements to your org responsibilities—isn’t exactly the healthiest setup. Yes, there are deadlines to follow, and that class project isn’t going to finish itself. But you’re not some machine with unlimited brainpower to expend (Just think, even your phones get drained and need recharging, too).

It might take you weeks to finally conquer that massive to-do list, and after that, you’ll want to hibernate for another two weeks before you emerge into the world again. And that’s fine! Take the time you need to recharge. After all, lending a helping hand when you’ve got no strength to pull them up might not be helping them out at all. Stil...

Our friends make up an important part of our lives.

Compared to familial ties, the thing that makes friendships one of the most precious kinds of bonds we’ll ever have is that it’s a relationship we get into on our own accord because we resonate so much with these people and feel like they are a necessary presence in our lives. Friendships aren’t just about the labels. They require actions, too. And while we all have our own priorities in life, the relationships we voluntarily foster must at least make it to that list.  

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If you had to choose, would you pick your career over your friends? Well, studies show that both are actually important and go hand-in-hand. Fostering meaningful relationships actually benefit our physical well-being, but they’re also helpful when it comes to our emotional health. When we’ve fostered healthy relationships, we shouldn’t forget to take care of them, no matter how hectic our schedules can be.

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About the author
Mylene Mendoza
Candy Staff Writer