A Candy Girl's Guide to Dealing With Insecurity

by Daryn Agapay   |  Nov 5, 2015
ART Trixie Ison
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We've all dealt with a little insecurity at some point in our lives. Who hasn't? It's human nature to want to have a sense of belonging and to be accepted by their peers. But sometimes insecurity just looms over us like a dark cloud profusely raining on our parade, therefore robbing us of our much-needed confidence. What can you do if your insecurity is just a little too much to handle? Here we've gathered a list of tips and tricks to help you get along your merry way and push those haunting clouds back to where they belong–locked up in the very back of your mind.

 1  Change your mindset.

The first step to dealing with insecurity is changing the way you look at yourself. Self-worth starts with you and shouldn't be dependent on material things or on others to justify it. This means not comparing yourself to others or bringing other people down so you can feel better about yourself. Remember that bullying is never cool.

 2  Know your peers.

Insecurity can be contagious—and even more so when you surround yourself with people who are constantly scrutinizing themselves. "My pores are too big," "I hate my calves," "at least you guys can wear halter tops I have man-shoulders." Do these phrases sound familiar? No, they're not just actual lines from the movie Mean Girls. If you surround yourself with people who constantly find something to hate about themselves then maybe that's exactly what fuels your insecurity in the first place. It's probably time to find a new set of friends.


 3  Challenge yourself with extracurricular activities.

Are you the sporty type? Try out for the school varsity team! If you can sing, audition for the choir. The idea is to find something you're good at and will love wholeheartedly. Not only will it help you improve your talents but it will also help you feel more confident about yourself, especially when you're surrounded with people who have similar goals.

 4  Take care of yourself.

Sure, being beautiful on the inside is super important, but don't forget to take care of yourself on the outside as well. This means practicing proper hygiene and making an effort to look neat and polished every time. You shouldn't change who you are to please others because they will judge anyway. Just don't forget that show-stopping smile! It's the perfect accessory, every day.

 5  Build healthy relationships with others.

Similar to purging yourself of the scrutinizing people in your life, be sure to go out and build healthy relationships with others who love and embrace your quirkiness as it is and would celebrate who you are as a person. Surround yourself with these people and you will surely be proud of your own brand of drop-dead gorgeous.

 6  Know that everyone has insecurities.

Everyone has insecurities. Yes, even the most popular girl in school who seems to have the perfect everything. Insecurity is not entirely a bad thing. What makes insecurity evil is when it takes control of you and prevents you from growing as a person. Always remember that no one is perfect and flaws are what makes us unique. So wear your flaws like you would a medal, with pride and ardor.

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About the author
Daryn Agapay
Candymag.com Correspondent
As a certified Candy Girl, I constantly push myself out of my comfort zone to experience all the adventure life can bring and to pour my heart out into everything I do. If I'm not writing, you may find me obsessing about cats, latte art, fashion, books, or french fries.
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