Let's face it, we never mean to intentionally hurt our friends. But one way or another, it happens anyway. It's the reality of life. One second, you and your best friend are munching on a cake of rainbows, sprinkles, and happiness, then the next, you're sitting alone in the middle of the cafeteria, an empty plate scattered with crumbs and whipped cream, as the only proof of company left for anyone to bear.
If we aren't careful, people we hold very close to our hearts can slip right through our fingertips with just one thoughtless comment. So here are 9 ways you might be unconsciously embarrassing your friends that you need to take note of in order to ensure you’ll never have to watch another kabarkada slide out of your life again.
1 You make public what should obviously stay private.
We may not have floating Facebook privacy settings to tell us just how far our words can be shared, but it doesn't take a genius to know that as long as your best friend is warily looking side-to-side and almost mutely whispering her kwento in your ear, you should probably reconsider your usual plan of screaming out the juicy deets to the whole student body later on in the day.
2 You tease her about something she's uncomfortable with.
It may seem like a humorous taunt, but it's only counted funny if both parties are laughing. So if she's sending you death glares from across the room as you quip about everything and anything you know gets under her skin, then maybe it's time to stop and make sure you haven’t crossed that fine line between funny and mean.
3 You "jokingly" insult her in front of other people.
Sure calling her hair a bird’s nest might fly when it's just the two of you confined in the privacy of your bedroom and underneath the unspoken non-disclosure oath of a sleepover, but in front of classmates and possibly phony peers? Not so much.
4 You call her out in public.
She knows she needs to work on her anger management issues. She knows she often talks without thinking. She knows she needs to learn to control her emotions. She knows. And so does anyone within the vicinity who just so happens to possess an ear or basic knowledge of angry hand gestures.
5 You dig up what's already dead.
There's a reason why the revival of what's already gone is a feat only left for magicians—because trying to pull back the past into the present is something we just don't have any room for here in reality. So instead of casually bringing up that one time back in second grade when she did that entirely knee-slappin' hilarious thing, just zip your lips and throw away the key unless you want the next big disappearing act to be your friendship.
6 You invite her somewhere but end up leaving her halfway into the event.
Golden rule: Do unto others what you want others to do unto you. So unless you fancy awkwardly hovering by the snacks table in a party you weren't directly invited to, surrounded by people you aren't directly familiar with, because of friend who indirectly just left you there to suffer, then maybe you should get a rain check on that "invite and isolate" habit of yours.
7 You degrade her ideas.
As much as we do encourage you to always speak your mind and be honest to others, every girl still needs to learn the art of selective speaking—we only have so much consumable energy available in a day, so do you really want to use that very limited amount on telling your best friend just how stupid and utterly ridiculous you think her idea is?
8 You put her in awkward situations.
Do you, your friend, and everyone else within a 5-mile radius, a favor, and please try to stop yourself from constantly winking and waggling your eyebrows at her when she finally musters the courage to ask her crush for a pencil. She sees you, he sees you, the birds outside see you, and they’re all wondering when you will have mercy on everyone and put them out of this incredibly awkward misery.
9 You joke about her insecurities.
Sometimes we girls like to spew sarcastic comments and retorts to each other when we're feeling the sass sizzling on our skin. But as much as we are ruthless in terms of responses, we can also be very self-conscious and fragile in terms of our reputations. So if you're the type to exploit insecurities and weaknesses to make yourself feel better, then there's a big chance you'll lose all your friends dear to you.