9 Things You Should Never Be Sorry For

by Micah Sulit   |  Apr 9, 2010
photo by Patrick Martires
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Repeat after me: "I'm not sorry. "Yep, you read that right. While tere are many situations where you need to issue an apology, there are also things you don't have to feel guilty about. Bite your tongue for the moment, Candy Girls—here's a list of the nine things you should never be sorry for.

  1. Your Abilities
    You won the Ultimate Board Games Challenge and the Wii Sports Tournament you and your friends had at home. Or you were elected class president, even if it was your friend who really wanted the title.
    Don't say sorry! You'll always be better than other people at some things—and worse in some, too. You shouldn't be sorry for what you can do. As long as you didn't cheat your way to the top, you have nothing to be sorry for (but don't flaunt your victory to your friends either!).

  2. Your Dreams
    Your family boasts of three generations of lawyers and everyone expects you, Miss Consistent Honor Student, to become one, too. But while law sounds fine, what you really want is to become one of the country's top fashion designers.
    Don't say sorry! Your hopes and ambitions are all your own - no one can tell you what you should want. There's nothing wrong with dreaming, and dreaming big, even if you desires aren't what others expect from you.

  3. Your Personal Choices
    Your guy's been dropping hints that he wants to get intimate, but you don't want to just yet. And your girlfriends were looking forward to partying all night this weekend, but you're not coming because it's your grandma's 90th birthday bash.
    Don't say sorry!
    You should never apologize for you values, priorities, and convictions. Your family and friends should respect your personal choices, just as you should respect theirs without passing judgment on them.

  4. Your Appearance
    After an all-nighter for a project, you come to school the next day with slightly tousled hair, panda eyes, and a hastily chosen ensemble—so not your usually well-coordinated, made-up self!
    Don't say sorry! There's nothing wrong with looking a bit messier than usual, as well as with following fashion trends—or not, for that matter. As long as you're not violating anyone's sensibilities (by, say, wearing a very low-cut top at an outreach for the elderly), you don't have to apologize for the way you look.

  5. Your Opinions
    You just can't understand why everyone's into Gossip Girl, and you think Andres Bonifacio is the real national hero. You get teased for always being the one in the group with the dissenting opinion.
    Don't say sorry! Everyone is entitled to his or her own views, tastes, and beliefs. You and your friends don't owe each other an apology for differing perspectives. In fact, you'll learn a lot from an exchange of ideas with you peers.

  6. Your Quirks
    You take bites off your burgers in a clockwise direction, you have a different handwriting for each subject, and your Candy issues are stacked in alphabetical order of the cover girl's names. Oh, and for some reason, your friends think you're nuts.
    Don't say sorry! Trust us, everyone has a streak of madness, even though some people keep it hidden. You don't have to apologize for your eccentricities. Maybe they drive your friends crazy, but those little details complete your unique personality.

  7. Your Me Time
    You like to disappear from the world every so often and be antisocial, ditching your pals for a day alone at the bookstore or at the spa.
    Don't say sorry! There's absolutely nothing wrong with taking time out for yourself and indulging in your guilty pleasures. You don't have to feel guilty for wanting to do things alone once in a while - it's healthy for you, and even for your relationships with other people.

  8. Your Emotions
    You just don't feel like joining in the girl's lunchtime gabfest today. And your guy pal has confessed his feelings for you, but you know you can't return his affections.
    Don't say sorry! You don't have to apologize for your moods and feelings. You don't owe it to your friends to always be as spirited as they are, and you don't owe it to your boy bud to feel the same way he does.

  9. Your Imperfections
    You are painfully shy. And you are annoying accident-prone. And you never get your friends' jokes, even if everyone else at the lunch table is breathless from laughing so hard.
    Don't say sorry! It's okay not to be perfect—nobody is! Maybe you wish you had more poise or a sunnier disposition, but in the end, it's your strengths and your weaknesses that make up who you are. All your flaws aside, you're pretty great girl—and that's something you should never apologize for.

Set These Scenarios Right
By saying sorry, that is. In these instances, a sincere apology can go a long way—and maybe even prevent all hell from breaking loose.

  1. You arrived home an hour after your curfew. Doesn't matter that you were just caught in a traffic jam—an apology tells your parents that you don't take house rules for granted.
  2. You realize that your friend's birthday was two days ago and you totally forgot! Throw in a "sorry" when you send you belated greeting.
  3. You and your boy were going to have a fancy dinner, but something came up and you had to cancel at the last minute. Even if it was an emergency, you owe your guy an apology - and a date!
  4. You borrowed your sister's favorite sunnies—and lost them. Apologize, and don't roll your eyes or tell her to "calm down" if she's really, really upset.
  5. You weren't listening when your classmate divided the labor for a group report, and you ended up duplicating someone else's part. Apologize to your groupmates, and do what you can to make things right.
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About the author
Micah Sulit
Contributing Writer
Micah is a freelance writer who loves to travel, take naps, hoard postcards, and send snail mail. Now she designs her own postcards for her stationery shop, Eden Street. She loves Star Wars and Star Trek equally, and Eleven is her Doctor.
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