6 Things to Do Before You Enter A Relationship
Relationships are like exams; you have to study first to get better results. So if you want the relationship to last or at least have a mentally and emotionally good one with someone, do the basics first.
- Make sure you're ready for a commitment.
It takes two to make a relationship work. If you want to date someone just because you don't want to be alone on Valentine's Day (or any type of holiday, perhaps), you might want to think twice. Not being in a relationship may seem like there's something missing in your life, but it's not the right way to feel complete. Don't date someone without any real intentions. It's not fair to him, and it's not fair to you.
- Practice time management.
Being in a relationship takes a lot of time and energy because it's not just about spending time with each other. There will also be sacrifices you two should make between your time with each other, friends, family, and schoolwork. What if the only time you two are free are on weekends? Are you ready to turn down other things just to hang out with him? Are you ready to give up your Saturday girls night out, and Sunday family day? Those hours talking to him on Skype that you could have used to finish your school project? Think about it. We're not saying you can't do it, but if you can't give up at least one thing for your relationship or you're stressed juggling it all at once. Maybe, this is not the right time to enter one.
- Let go of the past.
As cliché as it may seem, leave the past behind. No matter how much you want to try to change it, you can't go back in time just to make things right. If you think a new relationship can fix the broken heart your ex has caused you, you're wrong. Doing so will just make matters worse. Be in the present (something you can control) and enjoy it!
- Be open-minded.
When you enter a relationship, changes are bound to happen, for sure. Some of the things you like about him (or her) may change over time. Just keep in mind that the person you're dating is a person, not a fictional character you've made in your mind. He (or she) has flaws just like you. Be with someone who you can be comfortable and vulnerable with. The latter's might be a bit scary for some, but that's what love is all about.
- Love yourself.
Don't be with someone just to feel valued and loved. Oftentimes, we date because the feeling of being appreciated by someone else is nice. FYI, you don't need to look to another person to feel that way. You can totally do it yourself. 1.) Pamper and reward yourself because you deserve it, 2.) Know your worth; that's the greatest gift you can give to yourself, and 3.) Don't settle for less just to fill the void in your heart.
- Be the right person.
Sometimes, we're too consumed on finding "the one" that we tend to forget to check with ourselves if we're "the one". The question is; if you met yourself, would you be interested enough to date you? If the answer is no, then maybe it's better to work to be the better person first, rather than jumping into a relationship and searching for "the one".
Do you think you're ready to be in a relationship already? Sound off in the comments below!
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these sheets that exactly remind me of how I gushed in between my pillow and space you filled in the longing of my burned sorrow put smile to my sober face just like how a three year old receive her lollipop
i searched you everywhere and here you are laying down beside me in my imagination the walls that our screens built a boundary and an obvious message that says i can never have you because you wear clerical shirt and obviously you loved someone else before me
oh god, do I really want this forbidden love? that only exist in my imagination? that only exist through my words? would you, meine liebling, notice me and my art one second? because I am dying to say I love you.
A Simple Learner Who's a Great Pretender
Maybe I'm just a learner, not a weirdo. A learner that knows how to listen and pretend. A simple learner who's a great pretender. Pretending to be slightly dumb enough not to be judged and criticized by those who do not appreciate my existence. We surround ourselves with people who's levels are either beyond or below our intellectual behavior, because as for reality, people may use you either for their success or your downfall. Since then, people tend to judge someone who has an intellect with things they shouldn't be. Making them a criticizer, and most of all, calling them weird.
Honestly, I'm one of this "weirdo" who actually loves to learn things, and for the record, I'm bullied and stressed out for making myself not to learn more and go with the flow to dumbness I had. Have you ever feel being assigned to some task where you know every process to make it easier and faster to finish but turns out to hesitate to voice out because some of your mates put themselves in charge. There are times where I know what to do, what to say, or how to react, but kept myself silent and pretend not to know anything that may help us. Maybe it's a good thing to just go with their ideas and learn from their perspectives, but sometimes you can't control it and says something, and once again called to be a weirdo and let you finish the work by yourself.
It's annoying that you only know one process yet they gave you the whole work and let you finish it by yourself because they insist that "MAGALING KA DIBA?". It's not your fault being an intellectual person, knowing such things that may help you to pursue your dreams, and have the basic knowledge about something. You don't need to know everything, just the basics. And as for those people who do not appreciate your existence, let them be and continue what's the best for you. In some cases, you'll be annoyed by this but most of the time you'll be thankful for it. Not for now but maybe later. Just be yourself either a weirdo, a great pretender, or a simple learner, and always remember to lower your voice and behavior because no one loves that.
Just be a great pretender not to hear any runts and be a good learner that appreciates everything. It's out of nowhere thoughts of mine, but simply I leave you this my favorite life quotation; "Don't introduce yourself, Let your success introduce you"
Dear me in six years, I wonder how life will treat you when you’re already 26 years old. Will you be financially stable? Will you be working in an advertising agency while pursuing everything about the arts? Will you be doing freelancing and living in a condo by then? I don’t know since things are very uncertain. I hope by the time you graduate from college and face the real meaning of the world, you’ll know what the real purpose of doing and living in the art will be.
I know it’s been so tough ever since you turned 20 but that’s how life works, I guess. There will be a lot of hopes and trials, breakdowns, and breakthroughs but I have high hopes of you becoming the better version of yourself. You always do, though. You were never a quitter. Making decisions is getting harder and harder as you grow but I hope it doesn’t make you stop doing what you really love to do. You will face different people with different perspectives. You will feel like a stranger once again, it’s like you were back in your freshmen year. It’s going to be tougher than you’ve expected but you can do it. I believe you can.
Most of the time, people's perception of us as a strong person makes us feel that we are not entitled to be vulnerable because they might be disappointed for seeing our weak spots. And so when we are hurting, we are often scared of extreme emotions and so bury our feelings. We deny them, trying to avoid the pain we feel.
But by doing that, we are just allowing it to come back to us and haunt us. And when it comes back, it might be stronger and it will be harder for us to get over it than when we faced them first. I realized it just now that facing those emotions will scare them until they're gone. The saying 'Let it hurt until it hurts no more' goes true. Admitting your pain to yourself doesn't make you weak. It only proves that you are strong enough to acknowledge such extreme emotions without avoiding them. We are humans and it's okay if we hurt sometimes.
Before, sliding over the rainbows
Now, our hearts are bruised
Days once full of love and laughter
Became dawns of forfeited ever after
Smiles that bring ticklish sensations
Turned to cold question and answer
Figuring who would be the next instructor
The queen’s awake
Grappling to the happiness that the sorrow and sadness take
Going back to all the promises he couldn’t make