5 Types of Frenemies

Here's a guide to dealing with friends who sometimes you consider to be your enemies, too.
by Chinggay Labrador   |  Aug 1, 2010
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How to Spot Her: She’s the one everyone goes to when they want the latest tsismis. She’s out to criticize every badly done rebond job, every trying-hard-to-be-a-fashionista outfit, and every wrong move. She’s got every single person figured out (yes, even you!) and knows who is stealing whose boyfriend, who is cheating off whose math homework, and who still doesn’t know the latest dish.

What’s Her Deal:  Ah, Ms. Dirt-Disher—so quick to be judgmental yet so quick to be on the defense when people start invading her turf. This friend knows all the juicy dirt on everyone, which makes Nail Spa sessions with her oh-so-much fun, but once the tables are turned and she gets dissed, you’re asking for trouble. Because she can spend her entire life talking dirt about the entire world, but when it’s all about her yucky outfit or her embarrassing haircut, she’s on the attack. Meet Ms. Dirt-Disher, the bearer of bad news.


Be the Bigger Person:  Revert the direction of your conversations to more positive topics that don’t destroy people’s characters. It’s fun, talking about people’s dirty laundry but your friend’s got to realize that she shouldn’t dish it out if she can’t take it. Confronting your talk-happy pal can be scary, so do it subtly. When she starts criticizing someone, talk about that person’s good qualities. When your friend comes running to you, hurt that someone said something bad about her, let her see both sides too—how her painful experience is comparable to how awful she made Anonymous Acne Girl feel. That’ll show her that even the worst gossip isn’t invincible to trash talk.

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About the author
Chinggay Labrador
Contributing Writer
Chinggay Labrador is a freelance writer for several publications in Manila and overseas. An architect by profession, she loves to travel, dabble in design, bake brownies, bike, surf, practice yoga, and contribute to her family's blog, thehappylab.com.ph. She has released three novels, and her latest fictional short story will be published this month under Buqo Bookstore. She is currently working on a collaborative novel. Chinggay is also a yoga instructor teaching vinyasa yoga, foundations and restoratives. 
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