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4 Letters You Should Write at Least Once in Your Life

Go through this list to see if it's time to sit down and start writing a letter for someone.
IMAGE Clare Magno

Writing letters is cathartic. It gives you a chance to carefully reflect on things and take hold of the intense emotions you're feeling before reaching out to another person. Over the years, I've written about a hundred letters addressed to people who have touched my life—longtime friends, inspiring mentors, would-be loves, and more. These messages contained thoughts I was too embarrassed to reveal face-to-face, but felt I had to impart somehow.

They say letter writing is a lost art, but one of these days, you just might find yourself in a situation where the best (or maybe even the only) way to explain yourself would be through the written word.

A letter of gratitude

Who to give it to: Someone who's done you a favor

This is, by far, the easiest letter to write, but a lot of people fail to do it because they don't realize the importance of giving a "thank you" note. The phrase "thank you" actually has the power to make both the letter sender and the recipient feel good, therefore lifting two individual’s moods for the entire day. Writing a letter of gratitude helps a person count the blessings he has received with the help of someone else. Meanwhile, the person who receives the letter gains happiness knowing that his effort was appreciated.

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My personal letter of gratitude: The first "thank you" letter I wrote for my parents was the result of a three-day retreat in high school. My heart was filled with joy and love, so you could just imagine how cheesy that letter sounded.

A letter of apology

Who to give it to: Someone you've hurt

Saying sorry is an act that's tricky to accomplish in person. If you do it in a rush, you might sound insincere. If you cry while doing it, you might be forgiven out of pity. Take my advice and apologize through a letter. Think about what you've done wrong, own up to your mistakes, and promise to do better by enumerating the things you could change (but remember, never make promises you can't keep!). The letter does not guarantee forgiveness, but the courage to write one will show just how serious you are about earning the other person’s pardon.

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My personal letter of apology: I wasn't a confrontational person as a teen, so most of my fights with friends were resolved due to one person caving in (sometimes me!) and saying sorry via a handwritten note.

A letter of interest

Who to give it to: Something (or someone!) you're interested in

You could be gunning for an internship, applying for a university, or simply expressing your admiration for someone. Writing a letter like this doesn't necessarily yield results (i.e. the company you're eyeing isn't accepting applicants at the moment), but sending it out will show you have the initiative and the balls to go for what you want (who wouldn’t want a person like that, right?). Just make sure you introduce yourself properly, highlight your best traits, and explain why you believe you're the person they're looking for.

My personal letter of interest: I had the biggest crush on a guy who liked someone else. When I couldn't take it anymore, I spilled my guts and confessed my feelings for him through a lengthy letter. It didn't end up in a relationship as I had hoped, but the process of writing that letter assuaged my almost-bursting heart.

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A letter of goodbye

Who to give it to: Someone you're letting go of

Weigh all your options before writing this letter. Once you've decided to cut off someone in your life (like the toxic friend who always makes you doubt yourself or the boyfriend who repeatedly cheats on you), you must have a steely resolve and never look back. You can also write this letter for someone or something you’ve suddenly lost. It will give you the closure you want and deserve.

My personal letter of goodbye: I've written a handful of these in recent years—first when I moved from Candy magazine to Total Girl magazine, then again when I left my post as the latter's EIC last April. Writing those goodbye letters caused me to shed streams of tears, but they also allowed me to rehash some of the best moments of my life. And for that, I am grateful.  

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Now it's your turn! Write me a letter at webmaster@candymag.com to ask for advice about anything under the sun. I'll answer as much as I can and share them here on Candymag.com!

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Mimi Tiu
Former Managing Editor, Candy
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Winning Heart

The journey of how I won people’s hearts by having a winning heart

Whatever happens tonight, I am a winner. That was the last line I delivered in front of the roaring crowd. My knees were trembling and my smile was shaking. I wanted to radiate confidence but I knew inside me were whirling storms of uncertainty. I wasn’t sure how to carry on for the rest of the night, it was only the first hour and my soul was already exhausted. I stood in front of an unfamiliar sea of people, I felt uncomfortable as they fixed their glances on me. The stage was bright and flashy as my co-contestants glazed the platform with outstanding physique and beauty. I couldn’t look straight at them because every time I did, a bucketful of insecurity was being poured on me. The whole pageant took about a few hours but it felt like eternity to me. I repeatedly asked myself questions every single time I stood on that platform. My vision was impaired by the blinding spotlights and all I could hear were the deafening roar of the audience combined with the booming music of the event. My head was filled with questions like “why are you here?”, “Will you be okay?” What will others think of you?” “What if you fail?”. Every step was heavier as I continued to overthink.

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For a moment on stage, I felt like I was floating. I was staring blankly at the end of the gymnasium. I was awakened by the loud cheer from the front row, I fixed my glance and saw large letters A-B-Y. it was like a snap to reality, I realized that’s my name. This time I could hear the synchronized cheers of people screaming my name. I smiled, walked away from the spotlight as I whispered to myself “let’s do this”. As the curtains opened, I walked towards the stage I felt lighter and different from the person a while ago. Walking was much easier and my knees weren’t trembling any longer. I stood at the edge of the stage, wandered my glance, and smiled genuinely. Flashing those pearly whites took barrels of longtime stored courage from within me. I marveled at how I could see the rainbow in the lights, the spotlights weren’t blinding anymore.

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My feet started stomping to the music every time I pose and my hips would flawlessly sway to the music. The roar of the audience was overwhelming no more, it was like whispers lost in the beat of the music. I knew as I stood there, all I needed to do was smile and be myself. My name was called accompanied by the thunderous applause and booming cheers of the crowd. I stood there alongside with other contestants. I was holding a bouquet and a trophy. I could feel the heavy crown on top of my head. However, the trophy beside me was much bigger, the lady beside me wore an even flashier crown, it was the crown of the titleholder. That night I landed the first runner-up spot. My head was filled with “what ifs”. What if I did just a little better, what if I exerted more effort and so on.

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As I stepped down on stage, several people rushed to me. They were jumping, screaming and clapping. It was so chaotic that it took me a millennium to recognize them, it was my family. They were hugging me from all directions. When I saw their smiles I knew I did great. I realized that was what I meant when I said “whatever happens tonight I am a winner”. Their presence, genuine smiles, and warm hugs meant more than the trophy and sash that night. For them, I was a star who shined through the darkness of the night. Before leaving the venue, a hand tapped me from behind “Congrats,” she whispered I turned to see her, and to my surprise she was a schoolmate who used to tease me because of my chubby physique.

I smiled as I expressed my gratitude towards her. As I walked away, I realized that I accomplished something legendary that night. I was able to showcase that pageants are not only for thin-looking, tall people. I managed to snatch everyone’s attention with this average height and chubby body. That night started with so much uncertainty and insecurity. As I stared at my reflection, I looked exhausted but I was wearing a different smile. A smile of victory and bravery. A smile that defeated the stereotypes and stigma about people like me. That night ended with a realization that maybe winning isn’t always about winning the crown, it’s about winning people’s hearts and having a winning heart.

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Nicole Caluag A day ago

5 Mystery-Thriller Novels to Read

If you’re stuck at home and out of Netflix shows to binge-watch, then you might want to try and read these mystery-thriller books to match your homemade Dalgona Coffee.

1. The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides

The debut novel, and Goodreads Choice Awards Best Mystery & Thriller of 2019, follows Alicia Berenson, a well-known painter married to an esteemed fashion photographer. Life seemed perfect for Alicia, until one evening when she shot her husband five times, and… never spoke again.

2. Lock Every Door by Riley Sager

From the author of Final Girls comes this page turning novel about an infamous building in Manhattan called the Bartholomew. After stumbling upon an ad to become an apartment sitter, Jules Larsen has set out to look after apartment 12A under strict and somewhat odd conditions. Not long after stepping foot in the building, Jules has been met with unfriendly tenants, eerie noises in the apartment unit, and an abrupt departure of a fellow sitter named Ingrid.

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3. The Sun Down Motel by Simone St. James

If you loved Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho or David Lynch’s Twin Peaks, then this book is for you. After the disappearance of her Aunt Vivian while working as a night-shift clerk at the Sun Down Motel in 1982, Carly has set off to Fell NY, to work the same job at the same place as her Aunt had 35 years ago – with hopes of uncovering the truth lurking behind the Motel walls.

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4. Verity by Colleen Hoover

While known for Young-Adult Novels such as Slammed and Maybe Someday, Colleen Hoover offers readers a romantic thriller about Lowen Ashleigh, a struggling author who was given the opportunity to finish the three remaining novels of a successful series after its original author, Verity Crawford, suffered an accident and has become immobile. After receiving an invite at the Crawford manor to sort through Verity’s notes, Lowen discovers an unpublished autobiography revealing the truth about Verity. With the eerie atmosphere of having Verity confined in her own home, and who is seemingly aware of her surroundings, Lowen is certain Verity is not what she appears to be.

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5. Dark Matter by Blake Crouch

A mind-bending science fiction thriller from the best-selling author of Wayward Pines – Dark Matter is packed with the concept of the Multiverse and the philosophy of existentialism. The novel follows an ordinary Physics professor, Jason Dessen, who was looking forward to dinner with his family while walking the streets of Chicago. The next thing he knew, he was being held at gunpoint – by a man wearing a mask – and injected with an unknown drug and blacks out. When he regains consciousness, he learns that the world he woke up to was different from the world he knew.

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