Online shops are a catch-22: their convenience, accessibility, and ubiquity are supposed to make your life easier so that you can save your time and energy for more important things, but it is also their convenience, accessibility, and ubiquity that have made you spiral into an endless black hole of Shopping Shame. If Sam Smith has money on his mind, you have online shopping. Constantly. So when does harmless browsing become a full-blown addiction, and what should you do to get your life back on track? Look no further because this story... will NOT talk about those. Instead, it will just poke fun at all the insane things we do in the name of online shopping, and hope for the best! Crazy online shoppers, unite!
1 Literally every minute of your free time is spent scrolling through Instagram shops.
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You don't follow them to avoid temptation, but who are you kidding?
2 You don't just have Zalora bookmarked on your browser—girl, it's your homepage.
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New arrivals? Again?!
3 Your boyfriend probably thinks you're cheating on him because you always hide your phone, for fear of being judged.
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4 You've mastered the art of playing it cool when your mom asks what's in that new Xend package that just arrived for you.
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"Oh nothing, Ma, just a bunch of...stuff...for school."
5 Your bag is littered with deposit slips for different online shops.
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Plus, you know the drill: snap a photo and email to seller for confirmation!
6 You know what HM, COD, on-hand, sure buyer, and joy reserver mean.
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And you're not going to spell it out for anyone who doesn't understand.
7 Your heart breaks when the item you've been eyeing for weeks goes out of stock.
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SOLD is your least favorite four-letter word.
8 But that feeling you get when you've just confirmed an order—and beat someone else to the last piece of something, ha!—is priceless.
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Celebratory dance!
9 You know that the anticipation of waiting for a package to arrive is half the thrill.
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And when it finally lands on your doorstep? Man, it's a great day to be alive.
10 Online shops are always tagged in your OOTDs, because they're awesome and you almost feel like the people behind them are your friends.
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And you've been "featured" on their accounts at least once!
11 Because of #10, other online shops you haven't discovered yet leave comments on your feed like, "Hey, pretty! Check us out for ribbed tops and high-waist jeans!"
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I mean, what else can you do but succumb, right?
12 While reading this list, you've been secretly obsessing about that bodysuit you saw online yesterday, and will probably take a peek at it in 3, 2, 1...
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The mind is willing but the flesh is weak. Maybe you should stop? But OMG, it's still available! In your size! *clicks purchase*
Can you relate? Just tweet us @candymagdotcom or leave a comment below! We love hearing from you.
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