It has been two months.
Within two months I could've gotten a job. Within two months I could've helped my parents pay the bills. Within two months I could've bought myself at least one of the books on my list.
But instead, here I am, writing. It has always been my passion, writing. It is something I truly love. That's why it's sad that I can't seem to be that "writer" they're looking for.
It's just a little unfair. Our teachers told us to reach for our dreams. Our parents told us that everything is possible.
Then, why? Why do we have to be rejected everytime we pass our resumes? We just want to be a painter or a writer or a director or a doctor. Why do we have to fight back our tears whenever they pick that amazing person with a healthy resume instead of us? Why do we have to be this sad? Why does it hurt so much to dream?
I guess that's why others gave up on their dreams. Reality is just too harsh to dreamers. Too harsh that sometimes it feels like it forcefully separates you from your dream.
And for two months, that is what reality is doing to me. It slowly steals my hope to be away from me. I have been drifting in the air. I am lost with no direction. That's what it feels to be an unemployed fresh grad. Lost.
It's not easy at all. And the difficulty even varies from the capacity of each individual to absorb rejection.
It's just sad to think that after graduation, I am not living the dream anymore. It's about surviving to stay and exist. Well, to some.