Candy Feels

From Our Readers: Why Almost Is the Saddest Word in the Dictionary

Almost is really never enough.
PHOTO Columbia Records ART Clare Magno

Nothing hurts like the first one. It was a line I heard from a movie and as soon as I heard it, I suddenly thought of you. I suddenly felt nostalgic as I remembered the last words you said that changed everything. Yes, we aren't in a relationship, but we definitley know we are not just friends. In fact, we're walking on that thin line called in between.

I don't know what made you give up on me. Or maybe I'm just the girl who's not worth the fight.

There is no denying that love was there, hidden beneath the ashes of the chaos we created. And I want you to know that I really wanted us to work. I wanted us to be on top, with hopes of telling everyone they were wrong about you, about us. I wanted us to make it.

I am not the type to ever give up on people. I know you know that about me. But I can't do anything more if you stopped trying, stopped fighting. You have always known you were my lifeline but just like the heart, when it stops the whole human system dies—like how I died a thousand times when you gave up on whatever it is we have. Regardless, I want you to know how much I love you. I want you to know that had there been a reason for you to fight, I would still be alive.

I know I'll get my own fairytale ending but for now, it's a tough pill to swallow that it probably won't be with you. 

But allow me for now to not give up the chance of making it happen with you. Though that chance is starting to die down, I still love you with all my heart. Sadly, loving someone with all your heart doesn't mean that those feelings will always be reciprocated. And although it wasn't a relationship, you were almost everything I needed.

Almost.

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