I can't believe that it has been five years since I started dreaming about you and looking for you. I lay awake almost every night thinking if I will ever meet you soon. Would you be everything I've ever dreamed of? Would you be caring, funny, talented, athletic, poetic? Would you be someone I've never dreamed of meeting maybe?
I can't dismiss the thought that maybe I have already met in you passing. I have searched for you in the buses and trains I rode on, the schools I went to, the books I've read, the stores I've visited, the movies I watched, the countries I've been to, and so much more.
I also looked for you in the guys I met. Most of them seemed to be like the perfect guy for me in the past. They were humorous, smart, confident, good-looking, friendly, and good at singing, and more. Unfortunately, they didn't reciprocate my feelings for them. I wasn't desperate to find my Mr. Right then (even until today) but I was somehow losing hope that someone out there would like me as I am in the future. I told myself that perhaps I would grow old with no one to lean on.
Months and years later, my feelings changed for all the guys I admired in the past and then this dapper lad crossed paths with me. He was my schoolmate and we only had one class together. But what made him different from the guys I met was that he really valued our friendship and genuinely cared for me. I admit that there were times that I daydreamed of being in a relationship with him, but I also promised myself that I won't give too much of myself to someone I'm not sure I would want to spend the rest of my life with yet. Although, I'm still hoping that this platonic friendship of ours would become something more someday.
I promised myself that I won't give too much of myself to someone I'm not sure I would want to spend the rest of my life with yet.
Even if he may not be the perfect guy for me, I still believe that there will be a special someone out there meant for me (and that is you, my Future Mr. Right). I just have to wait and look out for the best that God is wholeheartedly willing to give me at the right place, right time, and hopefully our paths will perfectly intertwine.