From Our Readers: To the Girl Who Thinks She's Not Good Enough
"There's this girl. She's smart and witty. She's funny as hell. She's sexy and smart, and I'm trying my best not to look like an idiot in front of her."
"There's this girl. She's in my class. I want to talk to her, but I don't even know how."
"There's this girl. I saw her from across the room at a party. I got her number and I can't really text her because I'm not sure what to type."
"There's this girl. She's gorgeous. Her smile can light up a room like all the stars and the sun combined."
There's this girl. But she's not you. She was never you. And you're sure you know why.
You're a "Not As"—an entire list of "not as" qualities that fit into a single girl.
You're not as tall as that girl who plays volleyball, that girl who has legs for days. You're not as smart as the girl who gets the highest grades and aces every single subject she takes without even trying. You're not as funny as the girl who has the whole class laughing at a single side comment. You're not as witty as the girl who always has a quick comeback. You are not as flirty as the girl who knows what to say to a guy who says she's cute. You're not as friendly as the girl everyone says hi to. You're not as active as the girl who belongs to 10 organizations and a sorority. You're not as cultured as the girl who's well-traveled, that girl who can speak more than two languages.
You're not as creative as the girl who can paint and and do spoken word. You're not as talented as the girl who can dance hip hop, sing ballads, or recite powerful monologues. You're not as eye-catching as that other girl who wears the same shirt and jeans as you. You're not as interesting as the girl who knows how to speak French and Star Wars inside out. You're not as exciting as the girl who goes out all night and spends her days hiking or climbing mountains. You're not as fun as the girl who's invited to everything. You're not as sexy as the girl who works her butt off in the gym. You're not as dedicated as that same girl either.
You're not as amazing. You're not as attention-grabbing. You're not that girl. They're just two words that make up a phrase that doesn't even qualify as an adjective. It's a diminutive.ADVERTISEMENT - CONTINUE READING BELOW
It's cliché to stop someone from comparing themselves to other people. It's what you do best. Someone else is always more, is always an *insert adjective*-er. Someone else is always always, always that girl and you know exactly who she is. You know what people say about her. Her Facebook likes and Instagram followers say it all. Even those tiny trivial things matter, because she's that girl.
It's as if all you were ever born to hear was that you're okay. You're fine. You're alright. You're the middle of something. Too much of one thing and not enough of the other. Just about but not quite. You're never an extreme and it's like that's a bad thing.
"She is more," people tell you. As if you were a benchmark that people constantly pass. As if you were meant to set the standards for mediocrity. As if you were supposed to be that before girl that people never settle to be.
You're not as fair-skinned, but you're not as morena as someone else. Your height is fine, but your legs are not as shapely as hers. Your smile is okay but not as bright as hers. Your ideas are cute, but not as inventive as hers. You're not as informed, not as inspired, not as interesting.
You're girly, but not as much as she is. You're a movie buff, but not as much as she is. You're a good cook, but not as much as she is. You're a not as. But who says she isn't either?
There's this girl. She's not as quirky as you. She's not as petite as you. She's not as curvy as you. She's not as animated as you. She's not as introverted as you. She's not as in love with romantic comedies and ice cream as you. She's not as obsessed with makeup tutorials or new books. She's not as lazy as you. She's not as random as you. She's not as unfiltered as you. She's not you.
She's just that girl. She's a "not as," just like you.
And maybe that's not enough for you now. To be a not as or to see someone else as a not as. But as far as you're concerned, you being a not as is enough for someone. You're just not as ready as you will be in a few years from now, maybe not as ready as you will be a few months or a couple days from the moment you're reading this.
But here's the thing, you're not as a "Not As" as you thought you were. You're so much more. Even too much more. You're a little bit less. And that's okay.
What're you up to today? Submit your OOTD, fanfic, essay, school project, org event, a pic of your latest hobby, or anything you want to be posted on the Candy Bulletin page!
Hi! It's been so long since I planned to post my story in another platform aside from wattpad and now here I am, hoping that my story can be featured here.
My story is entitle "Who Are You," it's a tagalog-english teen fiction story so I hope, those filipinos who visit here can read my story!
WHO ARE YOU: PRELUDE
Sinungaling na ba ako kung sasabihin ko sa inyo ang pangalan ko? Hindi ako sure kung anong sasabihin kong pangalan ko pero may nagsasabi sa aking wag nalang magpakilala sa inyo.
May gusto lang naman akong itanong... Paano kung may makilala ka sa kasalukuyan na nagpapaalala sayo sa nakaraan? Anong gagawin mo kung ang nakilala mo sa kasalukuyan ay may tinatago pa lang sikreto na kahit siya mismo ay walang alam pero may kinalaman sa iyong nakaraan? Anong gagawin mo kung ang dalawang ito ay may koneksyon? Anong pipiliin mo? Ang nakilala mo sa nakaraan? O ang nagpakilala bilang ibang tao sa kasalukuyan? Past? Or Present?
There was this guy I dated for a while but things didn't turn out well. I was so into him that one night I can't stop thinking about him, I've decided to send his MOM a message on facebook confessing how much I like her son. I wish it ended there but no. I had to make it so emotional, lengthy and detailed like the drama queen I am. Luckily, it went to message request so I'm hoping she hasn't really read it yet. Up until this day it makes me cringe whenever I think about it but hey, whenever it pops in my mind I make myself laugh too so thank you self for being unbelievably shameless and brave when it comes to love. I may age faster because I have made a lot of cringe-worthy moments that I constantly make faces out of embarrassment just reflecting on my antics but I know I've made more hilarious memories than what ifs and somehow that makes the disappointments feel more like assurances that I have gave it my all and I have lived as honest (maybe a little to honest) as I could. #ItsOnlyNatural #CanBnatural
I've been investing in arts, photography, and writing. I've also got back to reading the other day and I finished reading this amazing book entitled 300 Things I Hope by Iain S. Thomas. It is all about the things the author hopes his readers to do in all aspects of life. So, I decided to make a version of it with all of the things I'm hoping for.
I hope I get to see my friends be successful in life. I hope to make a big mural someday. I hope to be a well-known artist like the artists I look up to. I hope to marry the person I am in love with today. I hope to be a little kinder to myself. I hope to see happiness even in the smallest things. I hope to travel the world. I hope to be a good mother and a wife to my future family. I hope to have my artworks displayed in a gallery or an exhibit. I hope to learn more about creative writing. I hope I won't learn how to get tired and give up my passion. I hope I won't get too hard on myself whenever I don't get the results I've been wanting to see in my works. I hope to love myself more even on the days I hate it the most. I hope to lead and empower women; to be their voice and for them to believe in themselves that they can be the woman they look up to. And when I've reached my limit of these things, I hope I won't get tired of reminding myself that my emotions don't make me weak, hence, makes me stronger. These are some of the things I always hope for. What about you? What are you hoping for?
I started fixing myself this quarantine. I mean, I started trying makeup products. As a teen, I'm on my phone almost every hour of the day, scroll on my social media accounts, especially Instagram, and also Pinterest where you get to see nice and pleasing photography by bunch of amazing and beautiful people from different parts of the world. So I started taking my own as well. I did not know that taking your own photo and try to get an Instagramable one is sooooooooo hard, it's exhausting. I do not have alot of space in my room, and I would definitely not do it outside our house because of Corona Virus, and I don't want to be seen by our neighbors HAHA so I have no choice but to make tiis inside my room.
Out of atleast 25 shots, only 2 are a nice picture. While I'm all sweaty and tired, I am proud of what I could do beyond my comfort zone. And this definitely built my self confidence, (and I secret love the compliments I received from both people I know and don't know) It's not my first time visiting in here, Candy! But I'm new to writing my thoughts and experiences, so bare with me HAHA.
Until next time!