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From Our Readers: Maybe We Just Can't Happen for Now

I still can't see myself walking away from you.
PHOTO Screen Gems ART Clare Magno

I have heard their warnings. They say skinny love will get the best of us, that it will take everything in us to survive. I never believed them. Until I heard your side of the story.

I never imagined having all these romantic feelings for us. I'm aware that there's a boundary between us, that there's a wall we shouldn't ever cross. Plus, we were in the same circle. Falling for you would make things way too awkward for everyone. But I still did, in the end.

I'm sorry that I fell for your words, even if I reminded myself so many times not to give them meaning. I'm sorry I fell for your actions, even when I kept telling myself that you're just being sweet because I'm your close friend.

I'm sorry that I didn't stop you from holding my hands while we were walking along the beach, I didn't realize that everything will change from that moment on. I'm sorry I returned your hugs, I didn't know it will make me fall for you even more. I'm sorry I let you call me at 2AM because you told me you missed me. I'm sorry I opened my heart to you.

I'm sorry I started to long for you, your presence even when you stopped talking to me suddenly and when you started to act differently. Maybe there was something there, I thought. I'm sorry for that. We started arguing, not like how we used to bicker and tease each other before, but real fights which really hurt me and maybe even you. I'm sorry I didn't stop myself from screaming at you. I'm sorry because I'm still waiting for your calls at 2AM. I'm sorry because I started to miss your hugs. I'm sorry I'm being emotional every time you're around me. 

I'm sorry for loving you even though I know we can't be. I'm sorry because even though I know I should let you go, I still can't see myself walking away from you. 

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