From Our Readers: I Was Never Enough for You
We were high school classmates and good friends, but I never thought I would fall for you. I saw something in you that I never saw in anyone else—something beautiful.
We were in our third year when we fell in love with each other. We both felt happiness, contentment, and completeness at that time. We agreed on most things and respected our differences. We were each other's best friend. You're the first person I would talk to when I have problems. I knew you couldn't solve all of them, but I just wanted someone who would listen and would be there for me. You were that person, always.
I just wanted someone who would listen and would be there for me. You were that person, always.
We graduated and remained together in our freshman year in college since we went to the same university. You were already planning to transfer to another one. All was well between us. We were happy and that was undeniable.
After two semesters, you successfully transferred and we transitioned to a long distance relationship. We just saw each other once a month whenever you paid me a visit in school. I'd get excited every month whenever you'd be there because I would finally see you and be with you again even though it would just be for three hours.
Every time we're together, we share stories of our everyday lives as college students, our unexpected encounters with people, and crazy stories worth laughing about. I was fine with our situation because we promised to stay strong despite the distance between us. We promised to make it work.
The first semester of my second year was finally over, but we didn't see each other on Christmas or any day during the holiday season. It was sad but I understood. I tried to be fine. Then came the New Year's Eve, you told me that we'll leave 2015 together. At that moment, I never thought I would be facing 2016 alone.
I thought we were good. Then suddenly, you got confused. You said you had a lot of problems. You weren't really feeling anything in our relationship. I tried to make you strong, make us strong. I cheered you up. But as days passed by, I knew you needed to leave. I gave you time and space to think. When you talked to me again, I knew that was the end.
After three years, all you could say to me, to the girl who stayed, was sorry. Since then, I never tried to talk to you again—even though I want to, even though I miss you. I'm trying to move on now. I don't know whether your reasons for leaving me were true or not, or maybe the real thing was you found another.
After three years, all you could say to me, to the girl who stayed, was sorry.
A month has passed and now I still love you and hate you at the same time. I could not give you my forgiveness yet. Maybe when my wounds have already healed, I would. It was unexpected and tragic. I've never felt this faraway from you before. I knew you like the back of my hand. And now, it's like I don't know you anymore, not at all.
How I wish I had the ability to unlove someone. I loved you like I've never loved anyone else. I gave you my whole heart, but that still wasn't enough. I thought you were the one. I thought you were deserving of my unconditional love. I was wrong.
I am not asking for you to come back. don't ask you to come back. Go on and live a life where I don't exist.