Candy Feels
From Our Readers: How It Feels to Admire a Bisexual Guy
What should I do?
PHOTO ABS-CBN ART Clare Magno

There's this guy that I really like. Right from the beginning, I already knew that I didn't have a chance because someone told me that he's bisexual. That he's already in a relationship with another guy.

I never really knew him before. All I knew is that we're batchmates, and I randomly see him with other guys who happen to be our friends at school. I didn't even find him attractive. Eventually, I got to talk to him and realized that he was the one that this random girl I talked to at the mall was talking about. She said that he was her former classmate and that we were taking up the same course at the same school; I might know him, she said. She told me that he's a great guy, but that he's also bisexual. She told me that he is really nice and genuine. He is not like other guys that you'll meet, maybe because he's not straight but he has a great personality.

As months passed by, I started to adore everything about him—his voice when he sings confidently, the way he laughs at corny jokes, the way he aces every quiz, and everything else. I don't know why but I like him very much. I thought his being a bisexual was just a rumor until I saw him one afternoon with another guy. All I thought that time was, "Confirmed."

I happen to see them together frequently and he won't even notice that I was there because they were both so busy being in love with each other. It's not really that painful. I find them cute together.

I don't know why it didn't hurt so much as I thought it would be. I still talk to him and I still like him so much even though he is different. This is the first time I've gotten so curious about LGBT, and I thought it's okay as long as they aren't doing anything wrong. Love wins.

I know that I really don't stand a chance, but I just want him to feel that I really admire him. I even made a poem and a song dedicated to him. Maybe this strange feeling of mine will remain hidden until it gets to fade. Or maybe one of these days, I'd get a chance to confess to him already, but I guess I can't. It feels different, funny, and good at the same time but I promise I'll grow out of it soon. I just want you to know that without even knowing, you made me so happy.

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