From Our Readers: 13 Reasons Why I'm Not Taking Any of Your Opinions
Unless you're living under a rock, you've probably heard of the popular Netflix series 13 Reasons Why. Lately, I've been seeing a lot of hate comments about the show all over the internet. And because we are all entitled to voice out our opinion, I listed the 13 reasons why I don't understand all the hate.
- Mental illness is not one of those "stupid little reasons."
Taking away your life because you were raped and bullied or because depression consumed your whole being is not a stupid little reason. You know what's a stupid little reason? Hating on the show just because you don't understand it.
- Not everyone who watches the show watches it just because.
Let's face it, most viewers started watching it because it trended and got on their radar. And there's nothing wrong with that. TBH, Netflix should thank them for creating buzz on social media. On the other hand, other people watch the show because they can relate to it or they find the story interesting and comforting. No need to judge people for their reasons.
- Talking about your struggles openly doesn't mean you're romanticizing them.
While it's true that the less you talk about your problems, the less anxious you get, it is never right to say that a person who openly talks about his problems is glorifying them. Been there, done that.
As a person who's been through depression and anxiety, I find comfort in putting my emotions and thoughts into words. Whenever the monsters would come knocking on my door, I'd grab my phone or laptop and write what I feel. This process helps me heal. So if you think writing or talking about depression or suicide means we're romanticizing mental illness, unfollow or unfriend us on social media, filter the posts that you see on your feed, and just leave us be.
- If you hate the show, do yourself a favor and stop watching it.
If you hate the show, that's okay. We can't (and shouldn't) force anyone to fall head over heels for the series in the same way that you can't (and shouldn't) force anyone to hate it the same way you do.
- If you hate the show, don't hate people who like it.
You know what they say, you know too much psychology when you can't get mad because you understand everyone's reasons for doing everything.
- If you hate the show, you're free to voice out your thoughts but be open to other people's opinions, too.
Because unless you're willing to listen to our thoughts, we won't listen to yours.
- Do not assume that you know how other people feel.
You think you know what it feels like to be raped, bullied, and depressed? Even if you went through the same hell as these people, remember that each battle is unique and your story isn't a snapshot of theirs. If you can handle things on your own now after going through these things, we're happy for you. However, never assume that you know how other people feel and what they've been through.
- Don't be a know-it-all.
Unless you're this omnipresent and omnipotent greater being, nailing your exams or graduating with flying colors does not give you a free pass to assuming that you know everything. If you're voicing out your opinions online (or literally anywhere), don't be a know-it-all because chances are, you don't know it all.
- Don't belittle the battles of others.
So this one girl took her own life because her boyfriend dated another girl and you judged her for having that reason for committing suicide? While you are a pseudo-intellectual who can handle yourself so perfectly well, you have to accept the fact that you don't know the whole story and that you don't know what she's been through.
- Do not say that other people have it worse.
Dealing with mental illness is no joke. When you say that other people have it worse, you're just making matters worse. It's like saying they have to thank the gods because these battles are a no-brainer.
Belittling other people's battles won't make them feel better. It's like saying they need to grow up and get a life instead of wallowing in self-pity or depressing thoughts, which is hard to do if you ask me. And while I'm willing to write about their struggles, there's no use unless you open your mind and remove your prejudices first.
- Just because you're strong doesn't mean they can be, too.
Consider these points: you all grew up under different settings. And while you may have the same mental illness, your experiences and struggles are unique. If you can manage to wake up early in the morning and go to work on time while dealing with depression, there are others who can't even find the strength to get out of bed.
Don't even think they're lazy. Sometimes, they can't find a reason to wake up at all. Because when everything around you is chaotic, no one understands, and you can't find your purpose, the last thing you'll want to do is get out of bed. TBH, when you are at your most vulnerable and you begin thinking about giving up the fight, it's even harder to see the light.
- Don't miss the whole point of the series.
Obviously, the point of the series is to spread awareness about mental health. The production team wants us to realize that sometimes, we do things subconsciously that hurt other people.
They want us to be kind to one another because we have no idea what's going on with other people's lives.
In a time where more and more teens are committing suicide, what we need is to be reminded of our responsibility to be kind to one another. If we can't be there for them to lift them up at times of need, we can at least avoid making things worse for them.
- You may be one of the reasons why.
You want to know the truth? It's because of careless people that more and more people, teenagers especially, are taking their own lives. I don't understand why you need to insist that they are weak, that they're making a big deal out of the stupidest reasons, and that they need to be thankful because some people have it worse.
Instead of judging them for having suicidal tendencies, the least you can do is to stop commenting on social media about them. Please stop spreading hate. Until you do that, there's a big chance you're one of the reasons why.
If you know someone who needs help, there are organizations that can help. Reach out and save a life.
What're you up to today? Submit your OOTD, fanfic, essay, school project, org event, a pic of your latest hobby, or anything you want to be posted on the Candy Bulletin page!
There was this guy I dated for a while but things didn't turn out well. I was so into him that one night I can't stop thinking about him, I've decided to send his MOM a message on facebook confessing how much I like her son. I wish it ended there but no. I had to make it so emotional, lengthy and detailed like the drama queen I am. Luckily, it went to message request so I'm hoping she hasn't really read it yet. Up until this day it makes me cringe whenever I think about it but hey, whenever it pops in my mind I make myself laugh too so thank you self for being unbelievably shameless and brave when it comes to love. I may age faster because I have made a lot of cringe-worthy moments that I constantly make faces out of embarrassment just reflecting on my antics but I know I've made more hilarious memories than what ifs and somehow that makes the disappointments feel more like assurances that I have gave it my all and I have lived as honest (maybe a little to honest) as I could. #ItsOnlyNatural #CanBnatural
I've been investing in arts, photography, and writing. I've also got back to reading the other day and I finished reading this amazing book entitled 300 Things I Hope by Iain S. Thomas. It is all about the things the author hopes his readers to do in all aspects of life. So, I decided to make a version of it with all of the things I'm hoping for.
I hope I get to see my friends be successful in life. I hope to make a big mural someday. I hope to be a well-known artist like the artists I look up to. I hope to marry the person I am in love with today. I hope to be a little kinder to myself. I hope to see happiness even in the smallest things. I hope to travel the world. I hope to be a good mother and a wife to my future family. I hope to have my artworks displayed in a gallery or an exhibit. I hope to learn more about creative writing. I hope I won't learn how to get tired and give up my passion. I hope I won't get too hard on myself whenever I don't get the results I've been wanting to see in my works. I hope to love myself more even on the days I hate it the most. I hope to lead and empower women; to be their voice and for them to believe in themselves that they can be the woman they look up to. And when I've reached my limit of these things, I hope I won't get tired of reminding myself that my emotions don't make me weak, hence, makes me stronger. These are some of the things I always hope for. What about you? What are you hoping for?
I started fixing myself this quarantine. I mean, I started trying makeup products. As a teen, I'm on my phone almost every hour of the day, scroll on my social media accounts, especially Instagram, and also Pinterest where you get to see nice and pleasing photography by bunch of amazing and beautiful people from different parts of the world. So I started taking my own as well. I did not know that taking your own photo and try to get an Instagramable one is sooooooooo hard, it's exhausting. I do not have alot of space in my room, and I would definitely not do it outside our house because of Corona Virus, and I don't want to be seen by our neighbors HAHA so I have no choice but to make tiis inside my room.
Out of atleast 25 shots, only 2 are a nice picture. While I'm all sweaty and tired, I am proud of what I could do beyond my comfort zone. And this definitely built my self confidence, (and I secret love the compliments I received from both people I know and don't know) It's not my first time visiting in here, Candy! But I'm new to writing my thoughts and experiences, so bare with me HAHA.
Until next time!