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What Would Maleficent Do?

The new Disney movie reimagines Maleficent's story, so we reimagine what life would be like with Maleficent 2.0 around. (Spoiler alert!)
PHOTO Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures International, GIFs Tumblr

When people are being noisy in the cinema. Maleficent has a habit of waving her magic fingers and putting people to sleep whenever they annoy her. Imagine how useful this would be for those times when your seatmate at the movie theater keeps talking unnecessarily. Much better than your frustrated "ssshhh!" for sure! 

When it's so hot one day that you feel like your skin is crawling from the heat, and then cold the next day that you feel like you're getting sick. Maleficent's powers know no bounds—she can will it to be the brightest, most picturesque Sunday, or the darkest, gloomiest Monday. While us mortals can't control the weather, we can still do a Maleficent by dressing appropriately. Flowy clothes for the hot, hot heat, capes and coats for cuddle weather, badass leather pants for battle—sorry, scratch that last part.

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What Would Maleficent Do?
via ilovett.tumblr.com

When you can't get a cab and your phone is out of juice, so you can't even use a taxi app. When Maleficent needs a ride, she just turns her wingman, who is literally a bird, into a magnificent horse. What you can do, however, is use your surroundings like Maleficent does. Are you near a mall or hotel? Go to the designated taxi line. Are you near a coffee shop? How about grabbing a cup while you charge your phone long enough to use a taxi app? Are you at a friend's house? How about staying there and letting the rush hour pass by? 

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What Would Maleficent Do?
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When a mean girl from school passes off your work as her own. Hell hath no fury like Maleficent pissed, who punished her enemy by cursing his newborn daughter. While that’s a little extreme for the real world, her guts to tackle the issue head-on—instead of just passive-aggressively tweeting about it—is an admirable trait.

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What Would Maleficent Do?
via max-prow.tumblr.com

When you’re fighting with your best friend and you want to take back what you said in hate and haste, but your scathing words have already hurt her. Maleficent, having grown fond of the baby she cursed, knows the pain of no takesies-backsies. Even with all her superpowers, she couldn’t undo what she’d done to sweet Aurora. Only when she became honest with herself and revealed her love for her little “Beastie” did she right her wrongs. Lesson learned: take a step back to give your verbal filter some time to catch up with your feels.

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What Would Maleficent Do?
via ithelpstodream.tumblr.com

Maleficent is now showing in cinemas.

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About the author
Dyan Zarzuela
Council of Cool 9, Managing Editor, Columnist
Stalks celebrities, watches TV, marathons movies, curls up with books, and flails at concerts for a living. Also: semi-hardcore Whovian.
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