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The 5 Stages You Go Through Before Finally Letting Go

Rushing yourself to finally let go of someone? Don't. Watch the zombie rom-com Life After Beth to help you understand what you're going through.
PHOTO XYZ Films, GIFs Tumblr

What do you do when you're in love with someone you can never be with—like a zombie or a person who acts (heartless!) and looks like a zombie? You let them go, of course. But don't mistake this process for an easy one. Dane DeHaan and Aubrey Plaza's zombie rom-com, Life After Beth, will help you understand this messy phase in your life better—no need to rush it, ladies.

Wishful thinking. Your initial reaction is to wish things would just go back to how they were before. You hold on to things—big or small (even that used table napkin from your very first date which you managed to keep)—thinking that he'll come around soon. There's no use throwing anything at the moment, you tell yourself.

The 5 Stages You Go Through Before Finally Letting Go The 5 Stages You Go Through Before Finally Letting Go
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Bargaining, begging. Days or weeks later, you'll beg him to come back and give the relationship another try. But deep inside, you know things will never be the same. All those issues will come rushing back in your head and there'll be no moment of peace for you.

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Distracting yourself. You'll be so determined to move on and forget what has and hasn't happened between the two of you, so any distraction—even in the form of a handsome guy—will be a welcome addition in your life. But know that this distraction will only keep your issues at bay temporarily. They're still there, and you have to deal with these things sooner or later.

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Facing the problem, finally. You will finally have enough courage to face your issue and get the closure you need. You'll be sorry for the things you've done and haven't done, but you know that letting go is the best thing to do because it'll be destructive to continue hurting each other.

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Finally taking a step to letting it go. Weeks, months, or even years later (and after a thousand relapses), you'll finally be able to let go. The sound of it will freak you out and take the breath out of your lungs, but know that things will get better. In time, they will.

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Life After Beth premieres in Philippine theaters on September 3

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About the author
Ayessa De La Peña
Candymag.com Assistant Section Editor
I am Candymag.com's resident fangirl and ~*feelings*~ girl. When I'm not busy researching about what to write next on the website, I sleep, read books, and re-watch episodes of Friends.
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Katherine Go 2 days ago

Cold Food

The most thrilling and delightful moment of any school day is opening up your baon during breaks. There is always so much excitement in unveiling your homemade meal and snacks housed inside matching heat-insulating containers. Because preparing packed meals is an age-old tradition of showing parental love, loved ones pour effort into curating a nutritious meal accompanied by a selection of side dishes, desserts, and beverages daily; it reminds us that we are being taken care of, even from far away.

Baon plays a significant role in a Filipino childhood. Almost every Filipino child comes to school with baon made especially for them by their parents or household helpers. Even Filipinos in the labor force continue to bring baon for varying reasons: to save money, recycle leftovers, cater to personal taste, or attend to special needs. Nonetheless, eating your baon is a heart-warming experience that allows Filipinos to bring a piece of home along with them wherever they go.

Even other cultures practice making packed lunch. In Japan, mothers create bento--Japanese meals in partitioned boxes. Because of the popularity of bento, trends have emerged, such as the Kyaraben, or character-themed bento. Naturally, Japanese parents and students began competing for who had the cutest and tastiest bento, and this is similar to what I have witnessed in my own childhood. I remember seeing my classmates sharing their snacks and lunches. They would compare and boast about their parents' or yayas’ cooking. In my case, I never had the chance to join in the competition or indulge in homemade cooking. Up until this day, I have never brought any baon to school.

For a long time, I envied others. As trivial or petty as it may seem, not having baon became a problem for my grade school self. During that time, I had to sit in a separate cafeteria away from my friends because the kids who bought food were assigned to sit elsewhere. You could consider me spoiled, but I wanted to experience something most kids did. I had food at home, so what made it so hard to bring some with me to school?

Now that I am on my final year in high school I have come to realize the benefits of purchasing my own food. Since I spent on food everyday, I learned to budget my allowance at a young age. Over the years, I learned to practice self-control whenever I wanted to eat more greasy fries and drink sweetened beverages. I have tasted the strangest viands at the school cafeterias, and I have repeatedly satiated myself over my latest delicious discoveries. Despite the struggles, I am thankful that I have never had baon because of what I have learned. Not to mention, I never had to experience eating cold food.

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