Chapter II: Seoul October '08
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She finally rests her chin down on her forearm at the sight of the newly delivered bouquet of flowers. If it was any other day, she would've been flustered by the assortment of flowers that has gotten more elaborate with each delivery. And for the last 2 weeks, her doorstep looked more like a Florist's deathbed than her apartment's entry way.
But today, the gestures represented by the flowers frustrated her even more. After getting ditched, slammed at by a door, and finally being refuted by his on and off boyfriend of 5 years, the flowers became mere accessories to his crime. Though they were all beautiful, each bouquet proved to her how much a coward he is for not saying apologizing to her face and how less and less important she was becoming to him.
“It's not your fault.” She said as she tuck the flowers into her arm and headed towards the kitchen.
“I really don't want to do this, especially to you guys.” She now stood in front of the waste bin, contemplating whether to throw them out or not. Initially, she felt mad over his inability to please her with the little things, like showing up on her doorstep with the same flowers she had in her hand, and she had wanted to get rid of the flowers just as she had gotten rid of the last 23 bouquets and 1 candy basket that he had sent. But right now, she really felt like it was a waste to just discard them.
“ It's really not your fault, so I guess I should just keep you huh?” She said sweetly as she examined the arrangement more meticulously this time.
“You sure are pretty!”Although the flowers had finally brighten her mood, enough to put them on vase, the craziness of talking to a bunch of flowers was enough to make her realize how she had spent the last two weeks locked up in her apartment, with nothing to do and no one to talk to.
“Ahhhhh! I'm going craaaazzzzyy!! She finally exclaimed out loud as she marched to her sofa. She quickly turned on the television, switching through channels like a mad woman. She needed something to do, but she didn't know what.
“I need to get a life!” She couldn't go out since she really didn't have any other friends, unless you count the ahjussi
1 at the local convenience store. She couldn't get a job since she only has a student visa.
“Of course!” She finally realized. She had applied for an MBA program at the Kaist Graduate School
2 with the hopes of getting accepted and finally be eligible for a student visa. It was a very prestigious school, so they say. But after imagining all the nice friends and parties that came with an uber popular boyfriend, she had decided to defer that decision for at least a semester.
But obviously, none of those things were happening. And by the looks of it she was so close to poking her eye out of boredom it seemed liked it was the only logical option for her now.
“Aisssshhh!!! I can't believe I was going to pass up the opportunity of going to this kind of school because of a boy.” She said as she browsed through the school's official web page.
“A boy” She repeated to herself. The mere thought of him flooded her with memories of both the good and the bad and made her eyes a bit watery.
“Get a grip...You're doing this...with or without him.” She finally said. She was determined, now more than ever, to bring some sanity back to her life and stop living in the fantasies anchored around him. She quickly rushed to her phone and dialled the admission's office, hoping with everything, that it wasn't too late.
***
The crisp weather of Autumn was now settling on her cheek.
“It was a good day to be in school” She thought to herself.
She was relieved when she had called the admission's office and found out that they would still accept her as a student for the fall. The campus of KAIST was a very welcoming scenery to her. It felt that she was back at Duke University, only less rowdy and had nicer air.
“This is nice” She said as she breathe in the cool October air. Though Duke was far more bigger and had more students running around, this was exactly the atmosphere she needed, a mature atmosphere where she could focus on her future for once.
“Bzzzzzzzzz” The sudden vibration from her phone startled her and caused her to drop her books.
“!@#$!” she said in a whisper. She was desperately searching for her phone inside her pockets, forgetting all about the books on the floor. But when she finally found it and saw who was calling her, it felt like Changma
3 all over again.
“Damn it! Can't he stop calling me even just for a day.” She felt liberated from saying those words. Finally she wasn't the one hanging around all day waiting for him to call.
“If you want someone to stop calling you, you can just have their calls barred you know.” A lithe young woman wearing a maroon cardigan said as she handed her fallen books
“Oops. I'm sorry... I meant to pick those up.”
“Its Ok...I was glad to help and I also can't help but notice that you had this book, so...”“Oh yeah, I have it for my Media Marketing class, a professor Kim...” she said as she read off her class schedule.
“Oh! You have Kim Pak-nim too!” The girl suddenly exploded with enthusiasm
“Yeah... I guess so...I'm Nisshi by the way.”“Oh my...how rude of me not to introduce myself. My Names Min Sul.”“Its ok. I'm really glad you approached me first. It would probably take me a week before I can carry out a proper conversation with someone.” And with her apparent innocence to the situation, they both laughed heartily.
“ Come on...You don't have class right now do you? You want to grab a cup of coffee? If your taking Kim Pak-nim for Media Marketing, you'll probably need all the tips that I know.”Without any hesitations she quickly followed her. She was right, and not just about their professor. If she was going to make friends without even being fluent in Korean, she needed all the the help she could get.
Even before they could sit down at the cafe, He had been calling non stop.
“Why don't you just turn it off?” Minsul said with a serious tone.
“Not to be rude or anything, but it seems to me its not the calling that your avoiding...its the talking part.”She smiled at her, realizing that she was right.
“Who is it anyway, if you don't mind me asking you, boyfriend?”
“Boyfriend"...hmmm...more like...a bad habit.” She said as she she sipped through her hot cappuccino.
***
“!@#$!” He said as he heard his call cut off by the other line. He had been trying hard to win her back and had even sent flowers every 12 hours to her apartment. But the only reply she got from her was an angry emoticon. Although he had been in dance practice all day, his mind wandered off to somewhere else and eventually ended messing up his steps all day. In fact, he has been messing up in practice for 3 straight weeks now and today doesn't seem to be an exception for him. He knew that what he did at their debut was unforgivable. But he thought that after all they've been through, couldn't she at least talk to her about it.
“Man..you're messing up bad. Come on... get it together.” Taecyeon, concerned about him, said.
“ She just needs time... you did slam the door to her face you know” “!@#$ you! I know what I did so stop !@#$ reminding me OK!!!!???” He furiously took Taec by his shirt and pushed him against the wall. Everyone was looking at them now. Chansung,Junho, Junsu, and Wooyoung looked like scared kids gathered on one side. No one dared to go near their two fighting hyungs. Nichkhun was about to intervene when Taec finally brought him back to his senses.
“Everyone's looking, get a grip” He said in a very soft whisper.
“Just relax. I know its a hard dance step, but we just have to keep on practicing Okay???” Taecyeon said emphasizing every word so as not to arouse suspicion from their spectators.
He finally let go of him.
“Sorry man....Its just that....” They both sat down on the floor. Taec gave Khun the hand and signals him to stay put while he talks to their hyung.
“Didn't the flowers work?” Taec asked
“No..”
“Well have you said your sorry?”
“About a thousand times!”
“Personally?...” Taec's voice trailed off, somewhat foreseeing his answer.
'I tried too. But practice has been so hectic lately and....”
“Look hyung, not to make you mad or anything...but if you could make time for your late night bootie calls while practicing before...you can certainly make time for this... don't you think your just avoiding the eventual conversation?”He knew Taecyeon was wrong.
“I'm not avoiding the conversation, I'm just merely hoping that she would understand.”
“Understand what exactly?”
“I don't know...That's its...its different now...”He didn't exactly know what he meant by what he had just said and he guessed Taecyeon didn't as well, since he only nodded in response.
“But you're right. I do have to be a man and talk to her. I'll do it tonight...Yeah..Tonight.” He finally said. He stood up from where he was sitting and lend a hand to Taecyeon.
“Come on. Lets start from the top guys!” He said as he regained his ,much needed confidence
***
It was almost midnight and what was surprising was she wasn't even home. He came to her apartment that afternoon to prepare her dinner and surprise her in his big cute bunny costume. But he has been wearing it since 8 that evening and she was still no where in sight.
“Aiggooo! If this is your way of letting me feel how you've felt for the past month, OK! I GET IT KNOW!” He shouted and scolded himself in frustration. He has been trying to call her, but as expected she just kept cutting the line off.
“ What time is it? Where the hell could she be?” He asked himself. But just then he heard noises outside the door. He prepared himself making sure he looked extremely cute for her.
“3...2...1” He slowly counted in his head. And as the door swung open, with arms stretched up to the sky he shouted
“Mianhae! Saranghea Buin4!”“ Mwo-Yaa5! Sheeba!6 What are you doing he...what are you wear....what is all this?” She said incoherently.
“Wow! We haven't seen each other in three weeks and now your learning cuss words in Korean, You must be really mad at me huh?” He said still trying to look cute.
She went towards him, examining hi effort. But instead of praising him she then bursted into laughter as the whole idea of the surprise started coming into focus.
“Whaaat???” He said with a hint of satisfaction in his voice.
“Don't you think its cute.” He started dancing cute novelty dances.
She, on the other hand, finally fell down on the sofa and was laughing harder than she was before. Her laughs gave him so much joy that he,even with her non-stop laugh parade, hugged her tightly. And finally, just as he hugged her, tears started pouring down his cheeks.
“
Hey...” She said after calming down her laughter.
“I'm so sorry babe! I really am!” He said in between hiccups
“See... If you did this right away.. then we wouldn't have spent 3 weeks like complete losers.”
“I know... I'm really sorry, but...”But before he could even say anything, she interrupted him
“No! No!...No buts this time babe..Let me at least savor the moment.”“Of course Babe...I'm just glad were okay...I thought you already...wait a minute...” Realizing that she went home unusually late, his tone suddenly changed
“ Where the hell were you? I've been waiting here since 5... You're not out on a date are you?”
“Hmmmm..what do you think?”
“Don't tease me now... You came home really late... So don't you dare think you can get away...”
“I was at school...” She said as she headed off to the dinner table. “Oh! Great! You made dinner! Smells good enough...” She started setting the table without realizing that he was running towards her, mad, confused.... and still wearing his bunny suit.
“Since when do you go to school? Come on Nis..if you're going to lie, at least make it a good one.” He then grabbed on to her arm and forced her to look at her.
“Mwo-Yaa! What are you taking about?" She said with her mouthful from the piece of meat he had cooked earlier. “ Isn't that what I went here for?"“But I thought you went here for me?” He said still very serious and not letting go of her arm.
“Well.. Initially that was the plan...But since your TOO BUSY... I thought of finally having a life instead of living off yours. That way... you want have to go slamming doors at my face”
“Look, if your doing this to punish me....”
“Aiggooo! Not everything is about you jay! Stop being such a narcissistic baby for Christ sake!”He was stunned. For the past month that she has been in Seoul, she never once heard her shout at her over the littlest things. Of course she used to do a lot of it back in Seattle, but here, this was the first time. And for some weird reason, it feel good. He felt that they were once again the old couple that both left back in Seattle.
“Fine Fine! I'm sorry! I believe you!”
“I needed to get a lot of books from the library. Since I enrolled a little late, I've already missed a couple of classes and catching up to them can be a !@#$.” She said alternating with getting food into her mouth.
“Slow down babe..” He said as she looked at her intently. She looked happier and he knew this was the best for both of them. It was the good balance that they needed.
“That;s really great...Is that the reason you haven't been answering my calls?”“Nope... I was just mad you” She said with a straight face still chugging down on the grilled beef.
“But you're not mad now are you?” After a long silence she finally said, deliberately ignoring the question
“How are you going home?”He was a bit disappointed at her ungratefulness towards his surprise, but he had guessed that with everything he had put her through, he deserved it.
“I'm not...” He looked straight into her eyes and gave her a slight wink and a pat on the head.
“ I'm sleeping over”***
“I forgot how good he looked sleeping. Just like a baby.” She thought to herself as he traced the outline of his ears.
“A baby elf.” She wanted to stay in bed a little longer, just to snuggle close to him. But sadly she had a paper due tomorrow for class. She forced herself out of her bed after kissing him softly on his pointed ears. She was touched by what he just did but at the same time she was worried. She kept thinking about what would happen in the morning, when the reality of him being an idol star set in. Would JYP come knocking at their door or maybe one of his members will come to take his prince away again. These and other thoughts keep running through her head as she sat, staring into her laptop's blank screen. The reflection of him asleep behind her gave her a flood of mixed emotions.
She was touched by his efforts and him being here tonight, but at the back of her head she can't help but think that something bad was coming, she just wasn't quite sure what it was just yet. She looked back at him and smiled. It had been a long time since they've slept together but looking at him now, she had never seen him so tired. Suddenly, guilt started to fill her thoughts. From his endless promotions to battling negative comments from anti-fans, she still had to burden him with her tantrums and little demands.
“But what about me?” She said to herself. She knew she was being selfish when she said that, but she didn't come all the way here to become a mere cheerer to his accomplishments. She let out a big sigh. Her life has gotten a lot complicated ever since coming here. A lot has changed, the language, the culture, and now, whether she admits it or not, even her boyfriend.
“Stop it...Stop it...” She scolded her thoughts for being too melodramatic. She decided to concentrate more on writing her paper than on her love problems. She started typing her introductory paragraph when suddenly her IM window popped out.
Min_sul34: BUZZ
Min_sul34: You Busy? 
Of course she needed a distraction but this wasn't the distraction she was looking for.
Ni_06: Yup...
Ni_06: U should b 2!
Ni_06: Rn't u doing the paper for class?
Min_sul34: Nerd! 
Min_sul34: I just finished..hehehe
Ni_06: who's the nerd now??KEKEKE
Min_sul34: Whatever...Just b sure to kip ur sched open next weekend..
Ni_06: Y? Whats up?
Min_sul34: U said u nid to get a life ryt?
Min_sul34: Well... I just myt hve got u 1! She was very curious at what was in store for her. Although she'd only known her for a couple of weeks, Minsul was being extra friendly and she was thankful for that. And even though she was uneasy with the fact that they were already on
“gimmicks-outside-of-school” terms, she was even more excited by the uncertainty of it all. She thought for awhile longer before responding.
“Its not like I'm cheating on him” She said to herself.
“ I don't even know what she has in store, for all I know I could be going with her on a pottery class.”
Ni_06: I won't ask...jst count me in!:))***
Footnotes:
1Old or middle-aged man
2Korea Advanced Institute of Science and Technology, most prestigious science and technology institution; Also offers MBAs
3means "the rainy season"
4a term of endearment used by old couples; literally means "wife"
5similar to the English expression"What the hell...?"
6 !@#$ or Poop, Korean swear word