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I was sifting through piles and piles of papers in my room the other day when I came across an old issue of the school newspaper where I wrote before. I saw my article about me time (my favorite) and I want to share it with you. Here it goes:

There are times when I find myself staring into the blank and empty world of nothingness. Maybe you’re wondering now what am I talking about. Doing nothing is such a waste of time. Since nothingness is the same as emptiness, I fill the spaces by spending time with myself. The moments of aloneness are what I call, “me time.” It’s absolutely boring if I don’t do anything at all so I do the things which I can’t do during class hours or things to free myself from stress. I want to share with you a few things that I do during “me time” so you can also get some ideas on how to spend quality time with yourselves:

Daydreaming. Daydreaming exercises the power of my imagination. Sometimes, I get inspiration from it and I put it down into writing essays and stories. I also figure out the answers to essay questions given in class like philosophical ones. Out of the blue, the answers just pop out of my mind.

Doodling. This helps me bring out my emotions and creativeness. Doodling can be tempting to do in class when you start getting bored but why not try it in your “me time?” During my free time, I doodle in my diary to pour out all my feelings and it makes me feel better. I also draw some figures and stick people to bring out my creative juices as well as entertain myself.

Read a book. Reading is a hobby that I grew up with. Reading has always been fun for me. It’s like an adventure where it took me to different places through my imagination. Not only that, it helped me enhance my vocabulary and grammar skills. In “me time,” I don’t read subject-related books because there’s a world outside of definition and terms. I don’t keep myself occupied with subject-related materials. That’s what “me time” is for—doing things that will help detach one’s self from stress.

Nothingness is never meaningless. Spending precious time with one’s self is good because it enables a person to connect with his mind, body, and soul. A person should always remember to give time for himself. He shouldn’t give in to too much stress to avoid sickness, have a happy disposition, a healthy body and a positive outlook in life. Stop worrying and thinking about so many things. Just relax and remember, it’s all about you.

Enjoy your “Me time” Candy Girls!

Jesselle

March is finally here which means….summer is near! Goodbye school! No waking up early, no exams, quizzes, projects, and terror teachers! FREEDOM! I’m so excited! But before I get so giddy about March, I will say farewell first to February, a month so memorable for me this year. Here are the reasons why my February rocked:

1. College Night. The last Assumption College Night that I attended since I’m graduating this March. I was part of the project team and my co-team members and I were so busy with the preparations for the event until the day itself. We were all very tired but our efforts paid off because there were a lot of people who attended and had a great time. I also had so much fun bonding with my friends and making the most of our remaining days together.
2. Valentine’s Day. I spent this special day with my family and it was really fun! We celebrated it at my grandmother’s house. We all surprised her when we went there all wearing red and brought food. It really felt good to see her happy. She was smiling the whole time we were bonding and eating together as a family.
3. Thesis Defense. My thesis mates and I passed! The fruit of our hard work! We all wore big smiles on our faces when our panelists told us the good news! We’re on our way towards the finish line and I’m very thankful to all those who prayed and supported us. Special thanks to the CoC 10 girls for their support! Their messages were all very inspiring and touching. Thank you so much girls! *HUG*
4. Last retreat with blockmates. Last February 22-23, my block mates and I had our last retreat together at the St. Scholastica’s Center of Spirituality in Tagaytay. The food there was so delicious and the people were very hospitable and nice. Anyway, I can say that our retreat was so memorable and meaningful for us because we knew more about ourselves especially what type of personality we have through the Enneagram. To know more about the Ennagram, you can visit this website and take the Free RHETI Sampler to know your personality type. As for me, I’m a Type 9: The Peacemaker. It’s really interesting because you’ll get to discover a lot about yourself. The retreat was also a time for us to let go of our fears, hatred, anger, and all other negative emotions. But most of all, what I learned from the retreat is to forgive one’s self and forgive others. Once we forgive, our hearts will be free from all the pain.

So there you have it Candy girls! How about you, what are your February highlights?

Jesselle

One more week to go and I will be free. Free from all the stress of school works and activities! No more homework, projects, midterm and final exams, quizzes, reflection papers, etc. Here are five things that I will certainly do after final exams:

1. Sleep. After all the nights of staying up late to accomplish school work, I will definitely get back to my old sleeping habit of sleeping as early as 9:00 p.m. When I sleep early, I always wake up feeling good and refreshed!
2. Catch up on my favorite TV shows. I never got to watch Gossip Girl and One Tree Hill anymore ever since I became busy with thesis, projects, and assignments. I never got the chance to hold the remote control and watch TV for relaxation. I did get to watch sometimes but just for a few minutes and I didn’t even enjoy it because my mind is drifting to other places—thinking about tasks that I have to do.
3. Hang out with my high school barkada. I miss them so much! We haven’t seen each other for so long and I’m dying to see them! I think the last time we saw each other was February of last year! We are all so busy with school and work (one of my friends is working already) that we never got to bond often.
4. Read more books. Reading is my absolute stress buster and it never fails to make me relax. I recently went to my favorite bookstore and saw titles that I really want to read. Some of the new books I saw were: L.A. Candy by Lauren Conrad, If I Stay by Gayle Forman, Lock and Key by Sarah Dessen, and Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Demigod Files (I love the Percy Jackson series as well as Greek mythology! I started reading a week before the first movie came out and I got hooked! I’m currently reading the 4^th book and bought the 5^th and final book last Sunday. :))
5. Make a scrapbook of memories of college life. I will put all my fondest and happiest memories of college from 1^st year to 4^th year in one book. It will be really nice to look at it in the years to come and reminisce about the experiences, friends that I made, things I learned, and the people I met in the wonderful four years of college life.

The clock is ticking by as I near the finish line. I can feel my heart beating in anticipation of winning the race. I can see the people cheering for me as I run the final lap of college life. In less than a month, everything will be over; everything that I have been through in the 4 years of college life will be a part of my history. This is my last stretch.

Lately, I have been stressed out; overwhelmed by the mountain of tasks that I have yet to accomplish—homework (endless!), preparations for school events, and most especially, thesis, which I believe is the agony of every 4^th year college student. I haven’t been sleeping well because even in the dead of the night, I am still awake working on school stuff and thinking about a lot of things. There are moments that I would breakdown and cry because of all the tiredness, pressure, and anxiety that enveloped my whole being. Sometimes, I’m on the brink of giving up but I just think about what lies ahead, what lies beyond the finish line-my future and the infinite possibilities that life has in store for me. I don’t want to miss out on those opportunities and live the rest of my life with regrets.  All these things depend on what I do now and if I give up, I won’t be what I want to be in the years to come. Candy Girls are optimistic and always ready for anything, right? And more importantly, reaching the finish line is my way of giving back to my parents who have worked so hard for me to get the best quality of education.

Despite all the stress that college life brings, I will surely miss everything about it—the independence, the relationships that I built with the people in school, and beloved AC itself. College life is a wonderful adventure and the 4 years I spent in this stage of my academic journey is remarkably too good to be forgotten. I don’t want to elaborate on these first because I haven’t reached the end yet. But when I do, I will. So watch out for that! I am looking forward to writing it too because I’ll get to share with you an experience that is very dear to me.

Sometime this week, my thesis group mates and I are going to have our final thesis defense. Judgment day, it is. We are very nervous but we are thinking positively. After all, we did our best in completing our paper for a year. Please include us in your prayers, Candy Girls!

Jesselle

P.S. Have you watched Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief?

Rock-a-bye baby on the tree top,
when the wind blows, the cradle will rock,
When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall
And down will come baby, cradle and all

This lullaby is what usually my grandmother sings to me when she puts me to sleep. Her soothing voice never fails to make me drift into unconsciousness. Mama Aida, as what my cousins and I call her, is a woman who exudes grace, elegance, and simplicity. She is also someone who loves unconditionally; thinks of others first before herself. A thoughtful person that she is, she loves to give gifts to her children and her grandchildren even when there’s no occasion; she never asks for anything in return. She’d give us cookies, junk food, pencils, books, notebooks, bracelets, and other simple things that when she gives those to us, we know that it’s from the heart. She also loves to crochet and make bags, bandannas, and bonnets for me and my cousins. Mama is also musical; she plays the piano and my cousins and I would dance ballet (even if we didn’t take lessons!) and sing. She was also very supportive to me and my cousins. She was always present in every graduation, piano recital, and other activities.

But all the happy moments with her were cut short because of one heartbreaking event. When she passed away 7 years ago because of aneurysm, I felt like the whole world tumbled over me. It’s difficult on my part because I was a witness to that attack. I thought that Mama will still have a second chance in life but I was wrong; it was already her time. No matter how much tears we shed, we couldn’t take our dearest Mama back to life. I really couldn’t believe that Mama was gone. I would think about her everyday and reminisce all the happy times that I shared with her.

I miss Mama Aida very much. I miss everything about her—her sweet smile, her gentle touch, and the tenderness of her love. I miss eating, watching movies, strolling around our favorite malls, and just hanging out with her and the whole family. Losing Mama hurts so much but life goes on. Even if she’s not with us now physically, she’ll always be in our hearts. I’m sure that she’s happy now because she’s with Papa in their happy place.

If I were to be somewhere in the world right now, I would like to be in heaven and see Mama even if it’s only in my dreams. She’ll see me as a grown-up now but still, I am the Jesselle that she has known. I want to hug her, tell her how much I miss her, and tell her so many stories of what my family and I have been through after she passed away. I want to tell her about my dreams and how she is an inspiration to me.

I miss you, Mama. I really, really do. Thank you for giving me a chance to be with you for 11 years. Thank you for taking good care of me whenever I was sick and for cooking my favorite corn soup. I feel so blessed to have had you as my grandmother. I love you, from the bottom of my heart.