An almost relationship can crush you while you never notice. It's like a bullet being shot behind your back, killing you while you stand unaware. I, myself, never realized how powerful this six-letter word is until I was in one, in an almost relationship.
What really happened? I allowed this guy to enter my world. He was like the sun. My earth revolved aroud him, the sun. I thought my "love" for him could cross seas and oceans just as his could go far beyond the stars. But love is tricky, and fate played along.
And so every day, I hung on to him. I put meanings in every single thing he did; I pretty much memorized the back of his hand. I let myself get attached because I thought he was into me, too. Those simple questions asking if I went home already, those it'll-get-better texts, and even him lending me his umbrella just to shield me from the rain—every single detail, I gave a meaning to. That's the thing with girls, we easily get attached.
The question is, does he really love me? I never knew the answer to that. The thought of us made me happy, but the thought of how to get there was a blur.
And so this is for you, who believed his words, trusted his actions, fell in love with his identity; for you who thought there was a possibility, who admired the idea of you and him together, who was nearly there and yet wasn't close enough. Let go of him.
Love shouldn't make you question your feelings, nor your worth. Love needs assurance. So if he is unsure about his feelings, let go. The more confused he is and the more you dwell in him, the more you will get hurt.
Do not allow him to have the audacity to break your heart because almosts are worse than nevers.