It all started with a simple crush—admiring you from afar, wishing and hoping for a chance to see you along the hallways of our university. You mesmerized me when I had the chance to be in the same class with you. That was the first time when I met you and truthfully, I couldn't take my eyes off of you. My heart raced and danced with the wind as circumstances brought us together. The butterflies in my stomach felt alive after such a long sleep. And this time, it felt like I can't control them anymore, wanting to burst out and fly by your side.
My heart raced and danced with the wind as circumstances brought us together. The butterflies in my stomach felt alive after such a long sleep.
It was your endearing smile that brightened up my day. The thought of you never left me; it was tattooed on my soul. Everything about you made me fall for you more and more, even your imperfections and flaws. Though I know we never had a long conversation, just you asking me about the subject were already enough for me to know you have a great heart. The gentleness of your voice and the calmness of your eyes were too much for me to handle; they made me fall in love without you even knowing. I was too convinced that if ever we'll end up with each other, we will both be happy.
All that rollercoaster of emotions made me feel like I was in cloud nine until I found out that you were in a relationship. I kept telling myself that it's all okay, that I'm okay. I thought it will always be "I'll be fine as long as you stay single" but I was wrong. Now, I'm bothered by the chances that I didn't take when I should've told you my feelings. I tried to convince my heart that being able to meet someone I could love was already a miracle for me. No matter who came, it was only you that I was longing for, praying, and hoping for, that someday you'll be mine and I'll be yours.
Now, I'm bothered by the chances that I didn't take when I should've told you my feelings.
I told myself over and over again that I can wait for you even if it will take me a lifetime to do so. But I guess it will all end somehow. I wanted to get mad at you so I could forget my feelings but instead, I got mad at myself for always running away from the opportunities of getting close to you and for allowing others to take their chance on you. Now my heart is at risk of never opening up for someone again.
I saw the sparkle in your eyes from being with her. That kept me wondering if ever I gave your eyes that spark even once
Until one day, I saw how happy you were with her. I saw the sparkle in your eyes from being with her. That kept me wondering if ever I gave your eyes that spark even once. Maybe, I am not the one, I was not the one who will be able to put that angelic smile on your face. But that made me realize that I should give you up and be happy by loving myself first before I could become someone who will be able to share these feelings with someone else.
That made me realize that I should give you up and be happy by loving myself first before I could become someone who will be able to share these feelings with someone else.
I am already tired of crying in my sleep knowing how broken I was. I am sick thinking that this unrequited love is not stupid. I want to stop fooling my heart that there is only you. This time, I won't be that girl who will selfishly chase after you but the girl who will silently pray for you to always be happy with whoever will be with you. I might not be able to move on that fast but one thing is for sure; when I've completely moved on, I wish to tell you that your happiness will be my happiness without the bitterness. Someday, I want to be able to face you and tell myself, "This is the guy I first loved and thought me the lesson no one can ever taught me."