Candy Feels
From Our Readers: Read This When You Want to Get Out of Yourself Again
It's okay not to be okay.

You always tell everyone that you're fine, that you're going to be fine. That's what you tell yourself, even though you know you're not.

Maybe it's the way you look. How does it feel not to fit that one dress you've always wanted to wear? How does it feel to be bullied just because of your waistline? Does it hurt when they call you names? Maybe you're just too skinny. How does it feel to starve yourself for that hot figure? Or vomit your last meal in the bathroom? Are you happy with the numbers you see on the weighing scale? Do you love the person you see whenever you look at the mirror?

You're different. No, unique is the right word. Then why are you always trying to fit in? To be one of the "cool" and "popular" ones? You're so much better as yourself. Yes, you can do a little improvement but not to the extent that you won't recognize yourself anymore.

It's hard, and it hurts whenever you hear awful things about the way you look. It makes you feel like you're ugly, and that you're not worth it. It makes you feel like you're an awful person.

I know how it feels when everyone's looking good and you're not. When you look at the mirror and imagine what you would look like if you were much "sexier" and hate your hair, your complexion, to hate every single thing about your body and every inch, to hear people telling you that no one's going to like you if you're fat or skinny, to look and feel jealous at those girls in magazines and posters, to wear what they wear and look just like them. I can't cover my ears or hide under the sheets forever to avoid them all. And it's just not possible.

I'm telling you, you're beautiful. Tell yourself that you're beautiful. You are wanted. It's not always about Cinderella. You don't have to wear those glass slippers if they're giving you blisters. Be comfortable in your own skin. Know that it's not about the waistline, the hair, the complexion, or even your cup size. You are appreciated. And it's okay to tell yourself that you're not fine. It's okay to cry. When you can't bear it all, just cry. And wipe those tears and tell yourself you're strong. I don't know when things are going to be okay for you, and I can't tell right now. But I know it will. 

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Know that it's not about the waistline, the hair, the complexion, or even your cup size.

Don't let people bring you down. Yeah, their words are very sharp knives, and you've been stabbed so many times by them. But you will heal. I know you will. And please, just please, love yourself.

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