Candy Feels
From Our Readers: My Friends Are Now Out of My League
I'm happy to see all of you together, but it's just sad that I'm no longer part of the picture.
PHOTO Wild Bunch ART Clare Magno

I don't have a sister, and I've always wanted one. Then you all came into my life and everything just got better.

I can still remember the times when we would just spend the night wandering through the city and enjoying the lights. I kept all of those memories deep inside me so no one can take them away. I'm selfish, but I'm only selfish when it comes to all of you.

Yet I wonder, do you still think of me as often as I think of all of you? Are the pictures of us together still on the walls of your room? Because I miss you. Terribly. You're not far away, but it does not feel the same way. You chose to explore, while I chose to ignore.

Do you still remember me? Because I can still remember those bits and pieces of us together, of the way things used to be between all of us. I know you're having fun, but can't you at least ask if I'm fine? Because I am not. I'm sad. I want to cry but there's no one to cry to. I know it's partly my fault that we became like this, but can you really blame me?

I just can't keep up with the way things are going with your lives. I don't have that same vibe that you all have. I know that I'm boring. You were the ones who brought out that vibe in me, but I felt like my light was running out. It was running out because all of you started to get more distant. Too distant that I can't reach you anymore. It's hard to reach you already. You have all become out of my league.

I'm happy to see all of you together, but it's just sad that I'm no longer part of the picture. I miss all of you, really. Can you go back and pick me up from where you left me? Because I can't speed up and catch up with all of you. I can't run anymore. I'm tired. I'm exhausted. All these years, I felt like I was running just to get to all of you. Now, I realized that I reached my limit.

I'm sorry, girls, I can't run. My feet are sore and my vision is blurred by tears. Can you please go back and help me stand? Can you please slow down? Can you please wait for me? I'm going to try to stand up if you'll say you will. But if you don't, you can leave me. I'm okay, I'm going to be okay. Just please stay together. I may be out of your league but you will never be out of my league. You'll stay here, forever. I miss you, and I hope you miss me, too.

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